


Sakura Haruno’s Magical Journey of Punching a Sage in the Face

by orphan_account



Category: Naruto
Genre: Also she’s antisocial, Also she’s infamous in the civilian side of the village, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF Haruno Sakura, Bitch was put in a new life, Bullying, But before you start gagging, Danzo is a bitch, Gen, Haruno Kizashi has infinite patience pass it on, Haruno Sakura-centric, Major Original Character(s), Minor Character Death, Old ladies are weird, Original Character(s), Original Female Character(s) - Freeform, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rating May Change, Reborn Haruno Sakura, Self-Insert, She has a conundrum about gender, Trauma, Yes it’s in first person, but it’s okay, but remembers it isn’t important, for being a menace, her parents still love her, imma punch the fucking universe, just know the story wouldn’t flow as well if it was in third, said fuck canon, this is supposed to be comedic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-07
Updated: 2020-07-27
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:48:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 25,828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24581827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Sakura Haruno died at seven months on October tenth.The universe saw this and saw the changes this would bring onto the world. Recognizing the changes to be too great they took a newly released soul and planted it into the baby.Sakura Haruno lived on.But that also just happened to be the greatest mistake the universe has ever made because now I’m here.
Relationships: Haruno Kizashi & Haruno Mebuki & Haruno Sakura, Haruno Kizashi/Haruno Mebuki, Haruno Sakura & Uchiha Shisui, Haruno Sakura & Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura & female original character
Comments: 82
Kudos: 354





	1. The Awakened and The Asleepened

**Author's Note:**

> My first time posting here! 
> 
> If I’m honest I feel like cannon didn’t do Sakura justice. But this isn’t about that. This is about a seventeen year old being salty over a new life.
> 
> Who also happens to have a lot of sass.....
> 
> Enjoy!

The last thing I ever knew was pain. 

I couldn’t hope to grasp at the air that escaped me as I was hit. The bullet tore through me and I wasn’t even sure where. I heaved and gasped but all that came bubbling up was blood, the sleek liquid running down my chin, drowning me. 

Most importantly was that I knew it hurt like a bitch. 

I coughed and wheezed, trying to intake air as the pain radiated outward, collecting around my chest and down my head. Thought means nothing because I do not know it. I can’t grasp what was never there and I can’t hold what was taken from me. 

“He- help-“ I try to beg. The words seem almost instinctive and perhaps that’s why it shocks me so much that I can’t get them out. 

Small words of advice, kids, if you’re shot. Don’t ask for help unless you know the person shot you isn’t there anymore. Suffice to say I got shot again and that hurt even  _ more. _

Sound buzzes around me as black spots begin to enter my vision, an end in sight. I see an end to the pain, to the blood in my throat, to the still stomping feet around me. I see what I can grasp and I, ever so selfish, take ahold of it. 

  
  


Then it’s quiet. The pain is gone but so is everything else. There is nothing and I am nothing. Because I remember nothing. I don’t know what I saw. What I remember. I only knew that I liked it until it got a little boring. And then it was ripped away. 

  
  


The first thing I ever knew was pain. 

I was crying, shrieking, desperate as this foreign concept of fear filled my body. Unlike the Last, I felt this pain much worse, there was no shock because my body couldn’t handle it. 

I heard this time. Screaming, yelling, crying, fire. It filled the air and mixed with my own cries of terror, a desperate plea to the world to end this suffering. This suffering of which I don’t even know, only hear and feel and remember, etched into my bones and my face. 

I can’t think here either. It’s only the memory that I can now look back on but at the time my brain wasn’t capable of well put together thought. I only knew instinct and want, two things that lead me to trying to move. Movement seemed to be a mistake and impossible. For all I felt was more pain and undeveloped muscles that got me nowhere. 

If I was able to rationalize that I was a baby with said baby brain then I’d realize the reason for that. As is I was but a stupid child who knew naught in the face of…. well, anything. I’d have a better comparison(or whatever it’s called) but baby brain stops me. 

I continued to lay there and cry, blissfully unknown to everything and all except pain. For if I knew what was actually going on and why this happened I would have a different reason to cry. I continued like that until once again my body was unable to handle it and I lost everything. 

But the universe meddled once so why not again? I did not die a second time on that October tenth. 

  
  


For a time there were only mumbles. I still felt the pain but like all things in life I grew used to it. I looked forward to the mumbles. The sounds prove that I’m still alive. I don’t think I want to die a second time. Of course I remember nothing of what comes after, only the phantom feeling of enjoying it remained. But I don’t long for it. 

I don’t find myself fearing for it, either. 

Still, I’m alive and that’s what matters to me. The pain is there and it feels enriched enough that it’ll never leave. I sit on these thoughts as I drift through my mind, fragments of thoughts floating around me. Still, even with my limited ability to keep thought, I knew something was wrong. And people said babies were dumb(they’re right).

  
  


There’s a difference today when I woke up. The difference being a strange wetness. Not all the way, though. It’s as if someone took some water and just flicked it on my face. But it’s not cold water. I don’t know what it is, actually. (See dumb babies before this.)

It continues and now something blocks my vision. With bleary eyes, all I can make out is some blurred form. It’s making noise, too. I don’t like the noise and it makes me match it, my own noise coming out. 

_ Take that, blurry figure! My noise is better than yours!  _

Then the figure is gone and I’m alone again. There are touches now, and I don’t like it, so I make more of the noise. I’m asking something but I don’t know what it is. I just feel the pain. 

Then I’m being moved, in the air, and into warm arms. They bounce me and I feel that to be calmer.

_ No! My…. my noise…. hey, this feels nice. _

Once again I’m exhausted and I go back to sleep, enjoying the comfort. 

  
  


For a time it was like that. Whenever something was wrong all I had to do was make those noises. If I were uncomfortable then the hands would come and I’d feel better. I’d grow hungry and then my mouth was filled with warmth to which I enjoyed greedily. It was the life of luxury….. well, almost. 

I’d wake with my side on fire, a pressing pain that has me screaming. It would stay like that no matter what the hands did. No rocking or feeding or moving seemed to help. 

_ I give this hotel one star, damnit! Who actually goes through this?! _

I believed I was in hell after a bit of this. That I really am dead and this torture won’t stop. That I did something in my short life to cause this. The pain simply refused to cease no matter how hoarse my voice became. I thought the hands were mocking me as they tried to move me in any such way. 

It made me angry. 

_ Who the Hell are they to make fun of me like this?! I don’t see you screaming in pain!  _

It went on like this for an uncountable amount of time. I’d scream and cry and scream and cry and then unconscious from exhaustion, the pain doing nothing to keep me awake. After that I’d dream. 

The dreams told me I was alive after all. I’d see my siblings in the dream and they’d smile at me. My little brother would say something that I’d struggle to hear. I’d reach to ruffle his hair but by the time my hand met his head he’d be gone with everyone else. 

It made me believe that I survived. That whatever  _ this _ is isn’t actually The End. 

  
  


It was another day of that pain. Where my side irritated itself and there wasn’t anything I or the ones around me could do. I’d scream some more, voice seemingly damaged to be hoarse forever, and all that was there was a hood that just wasn’t enough. 

By now this was just a ritual of sorts. An everyday thing I feel the need to complete so that there was no reason room for change. 

Then I was set down, my perception moving with it. At no notice my pain got  _ worse _ . It cut into me and flash as something touched the worst of it and I tried to please for it to stop. To tell them to just kill me instead of setting me on fire. 

Then it did stop and for the first time in my life— this life— I wasn’t in pain. It cooled me as comfort enrapt my soul, mending fibers already dead. It sunk into me, so shocking and sudden that I stopped crying instantly. 

Relief surrounded me. The pain was gone and so was my tears. Grateful, I tried to look with my bleary and unused eyes to see how such a phenomenon happened. 

_ Yeah, no, fuck this. _

And then I began to cry again. 

  
  


I was discharged from the hospital who knows how much longer later. I’m carried home in the arms of a stranger who calls herself my mother to meet another stranger who calls himself my father. 

_ I will gladly wipe that smile off of your face, you puny human.  _ (No, we are not acknowledging the fact that said puny human managed to live past me because that doesn’t count.)

He holds me tightly and I force myself to not scream in his face. Right now I am Bitter at the universe and would rather Punch It in the face. Unfortunately for me I’m a fucking baby in a supposedly fictional setting so that doesn’t seem very plausible. 

Fortunately for me the fictional setting is Naruto so I’ll just have to punch the next equivalent to the universe. (Which might be Kaguya which is still unfortunate for me because damnit there’s no way in hell I’m getting close to that bitch) 

In short I am spiteful now that I’m out of my baby brain. Which, by the way, did I mention that I’m a baby? Because I’m a fucking baby and I am  _ not  _ happy about it! There’s a reason no one remembers their baby years, damnit! Why should I experience mine with this almost- adult brain! (Okay, it’s a seventeen year old brain but that doesn’t mean anything now so hush.) 

So then began my scheming and planning of Punching A Sage In The Face because when you’re a baby you have a lot of free time. And I mean a lot….. 

_ Man, I can’t wait until toddler years. _

  
  


Somehow, within the time of developing this Foolproof Plan of mine, I’ve discovered a new problem. By somehow I mean I looked in the mirror and by problem I mean my  _ fcking face.  _

No, it wasn’t the fact that half of it was majorly scarred and burned. No, it wasn’t the fact that it’s the face of a baby. No, it wasn’t even the fact that it’s the face of a  _ female  _ baby. 

It’s the fact that it looks pretty damn similar to the face of Sakura Haruno! 

_ Excuse me, Universe, mind if you answer a few questions?  _

Unfortunately the universe is a fucking jackass and I receive no explanation for such blasphemy. I frown at the mirror and childishly stick my tongue out at it. Which…. wow my face isn’t that nice looking. 

The left side of my face has severe burns that looked to be newly healed. It was an amalgamation of if Zuko and Todoroki had a love child and then proceeded to physically traumatize it. 

Suffice to say this isn’t canon and if I was capable of more than gibberish I’d definitely be demanding an answer about this. Instead I scream at the mirror like any reasonable teenager turned baby would. 

And then I’m being swept into the arms of my supposed father, the man whispering that ‘it’s okay’ and shit like that. A scrunch my face in a very angry baby look and he just laughs at me. 

“Aww, Sakura, you’re as dramatic as your mother.”

Fuck I hate confirmation. As revenge I spit on his shirt, drool ruining his attire. 

He stopped and looked down before sighing. “I see you’re as petty as her, too. Don’t worry about the scarring, okay? I swear it’s not that bad.”

Apparently he thinks I’m hung up over the scar. Which is pretty rude like….. hey, I already know I’m apparently a girl here, but that doesn’t mean I value my looks yet. 

_ To be fair, anyone would be upset if they had a face like that.  _

My thoughts have betrayed me so I continue to pour in my fa- in the man’s arms while he lovingly raves about his wife. 

  
  


It turns out planning to punch a sage is harder than I thought. At least I know I’m plot important (though if I’m in an alternate universe is yet to be tested) so I might get close. Then again Sakura was poorly written in canon so…..

Well, screw it. I’m just going to scrap canon and change shit. If I was out here to act in Sakura’s place then they chose the wrong person, obviously. 

In fact, I’m going to screw canon over so hard that I’m going to prevent the Uchiha massacre. Do I already know that if I do that estimating what will happen next will be impossible? Yeah, that’s why I’m doing it. 

_ Take that you fucking assholes— trying to make me live a life when I should be dead.  _

The problem, however, lies in that I have no idea how to start. To begin with: I’m still a baby. So unless I happen to be in the right place at the right time then I don’t think I’ll be able to get all buddy buddy with those eye fuckers anytime soon. 

Baby years cannot pass fast enough, damnit. 


	2. Growing Before a Shitstorm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> At one years old she knew what parental love was.  
> At three years old she knew what betrayal was.  
> At five years old I wondered about friendship.  
> Five months later she made a friend. 
> 
> None of this prepares her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter sorta looks like filler but there’s.... a lot in here you guys need to know about.  
> I’d tell you but that’d spoil a good few things ;)

At one years old I knew what parental love was. 

Sure, I grew up in my past life with parents, but…. I didn’t feel like they loved me. That probably sounds selfish and angsty but it’s honestly what I felt sometimes. They never hit me or anything more than the occasional slap upside the head, but they also didn’t care.

They didn’t press me on bad grades, but they also didn’t say anything when I got good. Anything I’d show an interest in would turn into an opportunity for them to capitalize on whether it be something they can use against me or pressure me with my future. So, yeah, I didn’t really get the supportive vibes. 

Oh well, they can cry about my death to the press later. Or not because of the circumstances of my death. If anything, they’ll use it as a way to promote their own opinion which’ll get pretty annoying to my siblings, I’m sure. 

Should you really be thinking about your parents like that?

Well I don’t know, random voice in my head. I don’t really think it matters too much seeing as I’m, ya know, dead to them. Plus now I have new parents! Who are pretty cool if you ask me. 

“Happy birthday, Sakura- Chan!” My father cheers, spinning me around as I giggle. 

Who knew spinning can be so damn fun? Like— excuse me, bitch, I want upsies. And then I get them?! Crazy concept, I’m tellin’ ya. 

I babble lovingly, smacking his face with a big grin. My vocal cords aren’t as developed as I hoped— not to mention hearing a baby speak full sentences would be weird— so I’ve limited myself to babbling. My motor control, unfortunately, isn’t as controllable so I’m stuck with slapping my father instead of patting his cheek. 

“Aww, love you too!” But he understands. 

He proceeds to carry me around the house, getting me ready and dressed for the day. I don’t actually know what we’re going to do— canon delved that far into the show despite all of that filler. So for now I’ll enjoy the ride but not the handling. 

No! Coats! My worst enemy, get it away! 

“Really, Sakura, you don’t need to be so difficult-“

Smack

“........Like your mother in every way, huh?” He laughed. 

Does anything get this man mad?!

It appears not because he just continues to dress me before taking me out of the house. I’ve been outside before, of course. On shopping trips with my mother or surprise picnics with my father. It always seemed to attract unnecessary attention, though. Which, yeah, I get it— I’m literally scar face in baby form— but it’s not appreciated. 

At one point one of the vendors wouldn’t stop bothering my mother about it. She was being very rude about the entire situation, saying things like ‘How could you let this happen to your own child?’ Or ‘I’m surprised you haven’t killed her yet.’ Suffice to say none of it was tolerated and she had it coming to her when mama smacked her to next Tuesday. 

So while I’m not too surprised Dad is taking me outside, I’m still curious of where we’re going. He took me past the front doors and into the neighborhood, passing different streets as he narrates in funny voices. 

“And that is where your mother dented a tree!” He pointed to a random tree which splintered outwardly, the bark having been cracked. 

I can see clearly that it was grown that way but the sentiment is appreciated. I lovingly pat his cheek again, this time with a little less force. 

Hey, I’m getting better!

After a bit of walking, we stop a ways away from the neighborhood, clearly at a field. The scent of newly cut grass filled my nose and I felt myself relax into my father‘s arm as we approached. The quaint plot of land was filled with clovers and grass, speckles of buttercups adding color to the scene. It’s outlined by a flash of trees, leading into the many woods Konoha contains. 

In the middle of the field sits my mother on top a layer out picnic blanket, a basket of food next to her. The sun shone behind her, casting the woman in a practically glowing light. 

The man holding me stopped short, breath lost from his breath. Looking up, I catch stars in his eyes as he looks at her in amazement. It makes me feel as if I’m intruding in something private, only meant for the two of them and them alone. 

Before anything else can happen dad continued on, stopping just short of the blanket, shoes not yet on the cloth. 

“Hello, my dear.” He smiles lovingly. 

“I see you didn’t forget Sakura this time,” She smiles back. 

Wait, is this why I woke up this morning with him panicking- 

My questions are never answered(because I can’t speak) because I’m transferred into my mother’s arms instead. 

“Hello, dear,” Her green eyes sparkle brightly, love in them. 

It’s strange seeing such fondness from a practical stranger but…. I don’t mind it too much. 

_ Except you know that that affection isn’t for you- _

Well that’s enough of that, random voice! No need for you to go and ruin my birthday. Instead of paying attention to that voice I lovingly pat my mother’s cheek. 

SPITE.

“Just like your father,” She chuckles, setting me on the blanket in order to have access to the food. 

“Happy birthday, Sakura- Chan.” 

And so I feel love. 

  
  


At three years old I knew what betrayal was. 

My eyes stung with unshed tears as emotions my unmature yet experienced brain can’t yet comprehend fills my visage. An anger and righteousness as I stare down the one across from me. 

In his hands is the object of my desire which had been so wrongfully taken from me by scorned hands. I stare into the other’s eyes with all my furry, red in the face, practically matching my already pink hair. 

“.....Sakura. It’s only a bath.” The betrayer sighs. 

I make no move to acknowledge such words, only scrunching my face tighter in all my scarlet emotions. 

“You’re the one that decided to go digging in my garden!” He goes to grab me.

“No!” I screech back, running away from the dastardly appendages. 

“Sakura, no! You’re only half dressed!” 

You’re powerless, old man.

I cackle as I run out the front door. It’s a bright day today, perfect for a walk as the sun glows down onto the citizens who think the exact same thing. They also get an eyeful on me, running down the street, half dressed and covered in dirt as my father chases me. 

“Again, Kizashi- San?” One of the onlookers call. 

Again, indeed! 

I continue my mad cackling as my old father is desperate to keep up, taking long strides in competition with my short but quick ones. 

YOU’LL NEVER STOP ME-

“Gotcha!” He cheers, trying to contain my mass of chaos as I flail in his arms. 

“No!” I screech, panic returning as I’m brought back to the house. “No! No! No!”

“Scream as much as you want,” He grunts, struggling to hold onto my mud coated arms. “But your mom isn’t home until another five hours!” He says, joyful in my suffering. 

“No!” I cry out one more time, in a desperate cry and plead for mercy as I stare into unforgiving blue eyes that sparkle in mirth from my own misery. 

“No mercy,” he whispers. 

And then I’m dunked in the warm water, soap covering my form as my father scrubs me down, washing away not only my dirt but also my dignity and pride. 

That day I truly knew the meaning of the word betrayal. 

  
  


At five years old I wondered about friendship. 

I’d stare at the other kids playing on the playground and long to do the same with them. But….. something held me back. Was it the curiosity held in their muddy eyes? Or perhaps the careful grip my mother would keep on my arm, just a bit too tight for it to be reassuring? Maybe it’s the whispers that’d float past my ears, stemming from gossiping mothers that should be watching their children. 

So, no, more often than not I wouldn’t persu the company of the other’s.

I’d only wonder how it would feel to run with them, hand in hand. Perhaps sit with the girls as they braid flowers or tussle with the boys and wrestle in the mud. I’d be curious on how not yet controlled fingers would feel in my hair. How those pudgy cheeks would look with big smiles when directed at me. 

I’d ponder and turn the thought over until I’ve created a life like that in my head, but I never go out of my way to grant it true. Instead I’d grasp at the grass, pulling up the different blades to watch it be whisked away in the wind. Instead I’d lay and stare at the clouds, quiet in my complementation of the life around me and how I was granted it. Instead I’d explore the woods, taking note of the chirping birds and just how free they are to fly away. 

I wish I could do the same…..

My thoughts are selfish and desperate, only one of those attributes fitting a five year old. Such is the curse of holding two minds— one bitter yet not novaturient and the other undeveloped and confused. 

When my hiraeth became too much to bare I’d return to my mother, quiet in asking for the return of something she can’t give me. Mama doesn’t understand but she smiles nonetheless and holds me with love as we leave, leaving the curiosity, the hold, the whispers, the pondering, the grass, the clouds, and the birds behind. 

I breathe in the lemon smell of my home, the citrus flavor seemingly etched from the wood. My father sits on the couch as always, flipping through pages of his book only to look up with a grand smile as he sees his family. 

“Have a nice time at the park?”

And my mother and I would share a look, a mutual agreement that yes, we did have a nice time at the park. The park of curiosity, holding, whispers, pondering, grass, clouds, and birds. 

“It was nice, my dear.” And my mother would always answer. 

  
  


Five months later I made a friend. 

The occasion was accidental, by a pure chance I met them. The day started simple enough. I woke up, laid in bed for three hours, was forced to get up by my father, and went to eat breakfast. 

A normal day. Completely normal. Nothing to note at all. 

“.....Sakura. Please tell me you didn’t dig up the garden again.”

In my defense— child brain is impulsive. Child brain says to play in dirt. Who’s the adult( seventeen) brain to argue? 

My father let out a long suffering sigh. “This is the eighth time….. I’m actually running out of fertilizer.”

Then his eyes light up and I’m almost out the door before he catches up. 

“You don’t even know what I’m gonna say!” 

“No!”

“Is that seriously all you say?!” 

“......No!”

He sighs and wrestles me back to the dining room, placing me in the ‘dirt chair.’ It became the dirt chair after the first three times of me doing this and my parents needing to keep the mess at least a little contained. 

Which is impossible.

“You want to be a big girl, right? Just like your mother?”

I’m already a big girl! Boy? Not important! I’m already grown and gender isn’t the point! 

I huff and stay silent. 

“....If you get a good deal like your mother can I’ll let you keep the change to buy some candy.”

Alright, never mind. This is definitely worth putting myself in harm's ways. I nod once and hold my hand out expectantly. He stares. I stare back. 

“And make sure it’s good fertilizer.” He hands me the money and I grin, nodding once before zooming off, out of the house, and still covered in dirt. 

I head straight to the market, ignoring the flickering shadows that seem to be all over the village, and walk around each vendor spot, trying to pick out someone selling gardening supplies. 

No…. no…. ah, there’s my victim.

I ignore the stares my scar is attracting and bounce my way over with a hopefully charming smile. 

“Hi, mister!”

The vendor looks down with a raised eyebrow, taking me in with all my dirty glory. 

“Ah, you must be that Haruno child. How can I help you?”

My eyes glint. “I need a good deal on some fertilizer.” My voice, unfortunately sounds very childish and I’m matured but hopefully my good grammar will get the point across. 

“Ah….” he sets down the book he was previously holding. “I have plenty of deals on fertilizer. Let’s talk.”

Oh, you little fool….

  
  


I walk away in the end with only spending seventy percent of the money, more than definitely saving enough for sweets. 

I have a big grin the entire way as I skip to the shop, not watching where I’m stepping. 

This day is pretty goo-

“Ah!” I shriek, falling to the ground as my feet are swept from under me, dropping the fertilizer in the process. “Ughhh….” 

Sitting up, I glance at the paper I spilt on, the one that was so rudely left in the street. 

“HELP

Pearl Earrings lost! 

100% reward if returned!”

I frown. Clearly someone doesn’t know how to make a good missing poster. And for a pair of earrings?! Come on, person, we live in a ninja village. You can hire someone to do this for you. 

Not to mention whatever the hell ‘100% reward’ means.

Rolling my eyes, I stand back up, checking to see if I dropped any of the money in the process when- 

I hear a strange noise. 

Looking over to the alleyway adjacent to me I can already feel the suspiciousness of this situation. 

_ Haha, watch you get kidnapped. _

I travel my way over, searching for where the sound is coming from. I blink. It blinks back. I stare. It does the same. 

“Ya know….” I sigh, “Earrings don’t make good food.”

The squirrel chitters back, apparently sassing next. I’m surprised it hasn’t run away…. then again any animal from Naruto is weird. Who am I to complain? 

I humm. “If you give me those earrings I’ll get you some food.”

The squirrel, apparently understanding me(No, we’re not unpacking that), chittered some more as it ran up my leg, digging it’s tiny nails into me— which, ow, that hurts damnit, before perching on my shoulder. 

“You…. are very weird.” I don’t get it. Maybe it’s something to do with Sakura being plot important? I’ll just add it to the list of questions for the universe because right now I’m busy. 

“I don’t know what squirrels eat…. oh well, time for guessing!”

The squirrel is very lucky it didn’t die that day. Recognizing this, the bat shit thing seemingly decided I was chill enough to hang out with. So, after pocketing the earrings and heading home, it follows.

I stop. 

They stop. 

“.....I can’t actually take you home, ya know.”

They chitter. 

“I’m serious! This was a one time thing in which we have a mutual deal! No strings attached.”

A mother moves her son to the other side of the street as she witnesses the Haruno fiend talk to a squirrel. 

The animal stares some more, apparently trying to intimidate me into giving in. I start to sweat. 

“You can follow but no coming inside!”

It chitters more, it’s beefy little eyes staring into mine. 

“You’re not meant to be domesticated! I’ll get you treats and you can hang outside but I am not keeping you!”

_ You’re having an argument with a squirrel.  _

Shut up. 

The squirrel apparently doesn’t want to be domesticated. Only fed. Which is like…. pretty close to domestication. I don’t have enough information to argue the subject. Also child brain really wants a squirrel around. 

In the end, Squirrel follows me home and stays outside throughout the night, only seeing me when I go outside. Squirrel is mean, of course, demanding food all the time and hitting me with their tail. But it’s eh. 

At least I have a friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, Sakura definitely just named the squirrel Squirrel. Also I hinted at some upcoming plot points ;)
> 
> (Also: Sakura’s father sending his five year old on a fun little shopping trip by herself is there because I really don’t think any of the characters in Naruto know how to take care of children.  
> Like— they really do start the military indoctrination young so I’m sure that travels over to the civilians too)
> 
> Thank you for reading! If you have any questions please feel free to ask!


	3. Open Windows and Tea Leaves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fire and metal haunts her sleep but closed windows do worse when awake. 
> 
> Dumpsters aren’t a place to make friends but that’s why the two are outside of one.
> 
> Old ladies smile and yet she’s still chilled. Orange eyes watch her leave with a single pot, the entity growing pleaded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sakura: Thank god I don’t have to deal with politics anymore!  
> Sakura:*remembers Danzo*  
> Sakura: FOR FUCKS-
> 
> Haha memes

_ ‘The metal pierced my chest, tearing and sinking and tearing and sinking and something in me burst. _

_ I fall and it’s not slowed or quickened but my head feels so hatred it feels like both. It’s getting harder to breathe and I’m drowning on land in thick ink. _

_ I’m being covered and my arms are too sluggish to stop it. I can’t breath and I can’t hope to call for help. _

_ There’s screaming somewhere and it might be me or it might be them but if they’re screaming that means they’re alive and that’s all I need to know. _

_ I hold my breath and ink consumes the rest of me and then I find I don’t need to breathe. I’m floating or I’m falling or I just am. I don’t know and I kind of like it. _

**_“Fix this.”_ **

_ And then I’m slammed, jolted as my body is thrown down and conformed into a new space. I can feel again and it hurts. _

_ I scream and this time I’m certain it’s me screaming because I can feel it. I feel so much of it and I hate it. _

_ The fire burns around me, and just as the ink it consumes me all the same.’ _

I jolted awake, breathing heavily with my left side inflamed and lead in my chest. I choke out a sob and kick off the blankets, suddenly too hot. It’s too much.

Stumbling to my feet, I make my way to the window, opening it before climbing onto the branch closest to the opening and sliding over until I have a comfortable spot. The cold February wind makes me shiver but it’s cooling to my irritated side.

_ It’s okay. You’re okay. _

I’m okay.

_ You’re okay. _

....I’m okay.

Squirrel chartered from one of the higher branches and climbed down, climbing me once close enough.

“Are you always here or something?” I mutter, staring at nothing in the dark. They chitter.

“.....Figures.”

I’m okay.

I stay on that tree branch until the sun rises and my father comes to get me. Within that time my side calmed down and the bullets fell out of my chest. I was cold but I didn’t move. Neither did Squirrel, staying on my head the entire time.

It was also the first time I’ve ever seen my father mad.

“Do you know how reckless that was?! Not only is it freezing out but lord knows how long you’ve been out there! What if you fell?! We wouldn’t even find you and then what?!”

I stared at the ground as guilt filled me. Reevaluating the moment, I realized I only wanted to get away. I wasn’t thinking.

“What do you have you say for yourself, young lady?!”

“I was on fire,” I whisper, not meeting his eyes.

No answer.

I risk a glance up to see my father shocked. His eyes stare into mine, looking worried and lost at the same time.

“....I see,” He finally speaks. “I.... I didn’t realize you remembered.”

I stay nonverbal, eyes once again averted to the ground, eyes tracing the design of the rug. Light filters in through the window and birds begin to chirp pleasantly. I think I heard Squirrel chitter something, maybe once again caught up with that other squirrel that seems to come around sometimes.

“How long has this been going on?” His voice is softened.

“I dunno,” I mumble, shrugging my shoulders sluggishly. “Just was.”

We stood there in silence. My right side started to throb but I paid no mind. A question surrounded my mind, ringing and making me wonder if I should ask it or not. Because I don’t know where it came from. I have my ideas. My theories. But I’m just not so sure.

“Why is my face.... like that?” I finally ask, voice more timid than I’d like.

He didn’t answer my question but he did sigh and say, “Let’s go downstairs.”

I make no other reaction than to nod and follow, my bedroom being left opened. Squirrel chitters in confusion but I give them a warning look, trying to convey that this needs to be private.

Now the two of us are seated downstairs, honey milk tea in two mugs, both going untouched. I feel his stare but despite that I can’t bring myself to meet his gaze. We sit in silence for a time, the outside darkening with oncoming rain clouds.

_ You left your window open. _

I don’t respond to the reminder, only continuing my pensive stare at our oak table. I take notice of the different grooves, lost enough in the wood that I jump in surprise when my father begins to speak.

“You were seven months old.”

I hear the clock tick as the pitter patter of rain starts up.

“You were found almost dead and we weren’t informed until three weeks later..... I can’t tell you how this happened.” His eyes glanced towards the window and, just for a second, the rain sounded much more quiet than before.

I shutter.

“But there was an accident, of sorts. The village was ruined for a time, complete chaos everywhere. Thousands of lives lost and.... and we thought we lost you,” His voice cracked, tears welling in his eyes.

“Dad....”

“No, it’s okay,” He breaths out, trying to calm himself. “I can finish. It was chaos a- and someone grabbed you— straight from your mother’s arms. There were so many people, moving and pushing and running-“

He stopped again. I hear the clock chime nine.

“When we heard of a pink haired baby in the hospital we thought it was a miracle. That the Sage’s blessed us to let you live. We almost couldn’t afford everything, too,” He said, almost reminiscing with a smile. “But the luck just continued.”

I smile along, happy to see him able to find such a light spot in a time of darkness for our family.

“Originally, civilians aren’t allowed access to that healing stuff most shinobi have.... but a councilman heard our story. He pulled a few strings and a specialist cane to see you. First time we could hold you, after that. It’s also the first time I saw you peaceful since that night.”

I humm. “He didn’t ask for any money?”

“No,” He chuckles. “Councilman Shimura was very kind to us.”

I feel my insides freeze as terror grips me, eyes blown wide at hearing that name. “....What?” I ask weakly.

My father continued, unnoticing my panic. “He only asked that we continue to support this great village and how can I say no to that?”

My breathing picks up just slightly, knuckles turning white with how hard I’m gripping the chair underneath me.

“Isn’t it great?”

I don’t answer. I never do. I finish my tea and make the excuse of my stomach hurting before walking back upstairs.

In my room, my window is closed.

  
  


Despite my new information, nothing much changes in life other than my responsibilities. With my sixth birthday coming and going I find myself sent out to the village by myself more and more.

I don’t like being outside. I feel their eyes and how their words surround and swallow me. I forget to breathe, forget to move until someone bumps past me and I remember. I always remember. I remember that it’s more dangerous to stay in one place. That I have to keep moving.

I also remember how mean other children are.

It seems with age comes cruelty as they point and whisper, laughing in front of me and running away when I get too close. People have the misconception that they’ll mature as they age. They won’t. They only learn how to better hide it.

One day it came at a standstill when the pointing, whispering, laughing, and running isn’t enough for them. They steal something from me— a treat I wanted to bring to Squirrel. I give chase around the village, their longer legs always yards away as I fall behind. No one helps.

Eventually they dump it into a dumpster alleyway, snickering as they run off again. “Bastards!” I yell at them, red in the face and— strangely enough— unable to breath.

I don’t go after them despite my anger, only doubling over to try and catch my breath. Well, jokes on them. I’m not leaving without Squirrel’s present.

And so I take a deep breath and I’ve in.... before promptly being caught by a pair of hands. “Hey!” I squawk, licking out. “What the hell!”

“Ah, ah, ah, Racoon-Chan, that’s no way to talk to someone who just saved you from meeting the garbage pile face first.” The hands hold me up, face to face so I can see a stupid smirk on a very stupid face that I already hate.

“You’d be a lot more help if you stopped those kids from dumping my shit in the first place!” I snap and, much to my amusement, he looks surprised at the sudden turn in language.

_You only said shit—_ _I don’t know why he looks like he did the same word in his pants._

“Well, it’s a lot more fun to watch you run around like a chicken with your head chopped off.”

(Unknowing to me until many years later this is a lie. He only found me as a child about to dive into a dumpster, any knowledge of the previous happenings unknown.)

But because I don’t yet know this I’m righteously enraged which had my leg kicking out with more force than what’s probably necessary.

“Agck-“

In an instant I’m dropped again, myself landing a little harshly on my butt as the boy in front of me drops to his knees. I know that hurts because my little sisters did it a whole lot in my past life! Take that!

“I thought little girls are supposed to be nicer than this,” He gasps.

“I thought shinobi should be able to dodge simple kicks,” I snapped back.

He blinked, looking up, still in pain. “You can tell I’m a shinobi? Here I thought I was being smart by hiding my hitai-ate and everything.”

“You still have your weapons pounce.” I huff.

“Well, well!” He says with flourish, standing back up as if I hadn’t permanently barred him from having children. “Looks like we’ve got a smartie here! But how much is that by pure chance and how much by actual observation?”

Oh great, he’s bored.

I frown deeply, staring at the— apparently— excited boy. I’m not going to be the one to entertain him for the day and say as much, despite how his face dramatically crumples in disappointment and faux sadness.

“I’ll buy you that thing that was thrown in the trash.”

Oh no, bribery! The one thing I’m not immune to! I just have to make sure I don’t fall for it.

“Deal.”

_ You’re an idiot. _

“Great! We’ll make a game if it! We’ll go out into the street and then determine the occupation of those who walk by!” He grins.... I should probably put a name to that face.

He looks familiar, with curly black hair and darker eyes. I’m trying, honestly, but if he’s a random side character I most definitely won’t remember him.

Without my knowledge, I began staring intensely at the boy in front of me, much to his growing confusion and slight uncomfortability.

“Ah— You alright there, Racoon- Chan.”

I blink before frowning again. “My name is Sakura. Not Racoon.”

He hummed, nodding once. “Alright, Racoon- Chan, whenever you’re ready to go then.”

I twitch in annoyance, trying to keep myself from kicking him a second time because by then I knew he’d dodge.

“Who are you, anyways?”

Apparently, he looked delighted at this question and, really, I just want some peace and quiet. People are annoying to interact with and I’d rather avoid doing it as much as possible. Even in my old life I didn’t want to be around others who I don’t trust so going through this right now is..... troubling.

“You can call me Shisui!” He gives a thumbs up despite my sinking heart.

Oh you’ve got to be kidding.....

“Fine,” I sigh. “We’ll do this and then you have to stop bothering me.”

  
  


Suffice to say he didn’t stop bothering me. It turns out good boy Shisui is temporarily off of the mission roster and stuck in the village. For what I’m not sure— he’s not allowed to tell me. But apparently the person he normally bothers is gone so if was just his luck to find me.

My only solace is that Squirrel immediately tried to scratch him when they met. I gave them extra treats for that, despite how domesticated this fattening animal was becoming.

I won’t admit it out loud but I’m beginning to enjoy his company. It’s nice to be able to talk to someone that’s not an actual rodent or my parents and despite how we first met Shisui is actually pretty nice.

He finds my interests interesting and encourages me to explore them more. He doesn’t ask about my scar and I’ve never caught him staring at it. He can keep conversation and doesn’t mind staying in silence for when noise gets to be too much. And I appreciate it. It’s nice and I’m not sure what to do about it.

That doesn’t mean he’s always around me, of course. At most I see him twice a week because he obviously has more important things to do than hang out with a six year old. Today happens to be one of the days he’s not around and the day I remember something important.

Squirrel chitters on my shoulder as I stare in confusion at the paper in my hand. The same flyer I slipped on the day I met Squirrel. There is no address.

“Squirrel.....” I speak slowly. “I really don’t think this person knows how to correctly make a missing flyer.”

Squirrel chitters some more before hopping down and snatching the paper out of my hand, running off.

“Wha- Squirrel! What the heck!”

What else is there to do but run after them. I swear I’m going to make squirrel soup when I get my hands on that rodent-

I chase the traitor throughout different alleyways, ducking underneath arms and quite literally being forced to go through stores. The moments I think I lost sight of them, Squirrel reappears and this situation is becoming abundantly clear that they want me to follow.

Finally, right when I feel myself about to collapse from the exhaustion of running the length of the village, Squirrel comes to a stop and so do I, only having enough energy to breath and swear revenge.

“You,” I wheeze, “are dead.”

Squirrel chitters in amusement, dropping the paper in front of me. I look up from where I’m backed on my knees to see they brought me to a tea shop outside of the shinobi area of the village.

I glare vehemently at that stupid rodent, trying to stop myself from picking a fight. I’d probably lose....

Straightening up, I’m unfortunately aware of my now sweaty state but ignore it for now. With great hesitance— and with the encouragement (mockery) of Squirrel— I open the door and step inside.

The scent of burning incense filled my nose and I unconsciously relaxed as I took in the room. Booths lined the walls, next to curtained windows. There’s a dark lighting, making me feel more relaxed and a tad sleepy. Three seater round tables sat around the room, table cloth in pretty patterns covering it.

Shelves filled with jars of labeled tea leaves fill the walls, myself being shocked at the vast amount. A counter at the back of the shop— this time with tea pots— has no one behind it. Strange how no one is in the room.

With careful steps, I walk forward, wooden planks under my feet creaking with every other step, until I get to the counter. Squirrel huddled underneath my hair, bushy tail twitching at each breath. My hand landed on the silver bell, the sound resonating in the room.

“Hello?” I call out.

Nothing moves as it feels like the air itself pauses. Squirrel stops their twitching and the hair on my neck raises, an unsettled feeling settling in my stomach.

I look around carefully, frowning in confusion. Everything looks.... wrong. It’s hard to explain but I almost felt invaded, everything a tad fuzzy.

Squirrel continued to breathe on my shoulder, warm and heavy. Their tail isn’t twitching.

I back up a little, seeing how much darker the room looks. Something feels wrong. I feel trapped despite how open the shop is. It’s..... I don’t know what it is.

Shivering, I feel restless in my own skin. Unconsciously, I begin scratching at my arm, nails painful on my skin. And just like that something breaks and things are back to normal.

Squirrel chitters on my arm as I look around wildly, confusion growing.

“What was that?” I whisper as someone enters from the back.

“Hello!” She greets joyfully, wrinkled skin pulling into a lovely smile.

“Ah.... Hi.” I’m still unsure on what the fuck that was. “I’m here to return some pearl earrings.”

The old lady in front of me had her orange eyes light up, looking pleased. “Yes, yes! Oh, you’ve been the first person in nine years to bring me my earrings! And so young, too!”

I tense you, hand in my pocket clenching and suddenly the room doesn’t feel so warm.

“Right.... well, I’ll just give you the earringsand be on my way then-“

“No, no! You need your prize!” She insists, laugh lines pulling on her face.

“Really, I’m fine-“

“No, it’s important!” The stubbornness annoys me but I feel too impatient to argue anymore.

“Alright, fine, let’s just get this over with,” I huff.

“Yes, yes. Now, the reward is simple: I’ll give you one tea of your choosing and it will help!”

I pause, doubtful. It’s unlikely this old coot’s tea will actually help me with anything but I’m too tired to argue. Plus it’s free tea. How can I say no to that?

“Alright,” I sigh, placing the earrings on the counter before traveling around the shop for the tea.

Strangely, none of them looked appealing. Even tea I’ve had before and I know tastes good doesn’t seem interesting. I pause.

“Do you have any teas in the back?”

“No, only what you see,” She smiles, eyes closed as she folds her hands together.

I frown but move on anyways, stopping in front of the counter, eyes locked onto a black tea pot.

Fancy engravings in gold played a scene of a single bird, seemingly a ribbon in hand as it drags blooming flowers across the pot, a single lily opened on the top of the lid. Slowly, my hand reaches and opens the pot, revealing a single batch of tea. It’s unlabeled yet something encourages me.

“I’ll take this one?”

Her smile sharpens and yet I feel no fear. Squirrel’s weight on my knock becomes more apparent as they appear to try and hide.

“Wonderful choice, dear, let me just wrap that up for you.” I nod slowly, still unsure.

“Whatever you say.”

I go home that day, Squirrel oddly quiet, with a wrapped tea pot in hand, a single batch of tea I’ll never use from a shop I’ll never see again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mysterious old ladies are mysterious and oblivious fathers are dangerous.
> 
> We met Shisui! My boy! My unfairly pretty boy! And yeah— Shisui is most definitely bothering Sakura because Itachi is out of town lmao-
> 
> Lemme know what you guys think! Ask any question and I’ll answer!


	4. Fall Leaves(hah) and Winter Shows Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The seasons change and so do life. Sakura makes a rival and finds an interest in poisons, though Shisui is going through his own plights.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We’re going to start slowing down and minimizing the time skips. This will probably be the last chapter where we’re skipping between months because of this new time to go through. 
> 
> Also I finally decided on a solid update time: Sunday’s once a week.

The day was slow with the shining sun slowly passing over our heads. The grass pricked me through my shirt but it’s ignorable enough as I watch the clouds. Shisui rambles on about something, not minding that I’m not listening. Squirrel is a warm weight on my chest as they sleep, a show of trust Shisui doesn’t yet recognize.

“Which reminds me!” Shisui’s exclamation snaps me out of whatever musing has been going through my head as Squirrel chitters in their sleep.

“Are you going to join the academy?” My eyes widen and I have to stop myself from jerking and waking up Squirrel.

“What-“ I blink over at him, a little bewildered at the question. “I mean-“

I knew, of course, that if I wanted to have a sway in changing anything I’d need to join. It’s only the threat of Danzo looming over my shoulder that makes me hesitate so much. Already, I know that I can’t be a carbon copy of Sakura and do everything perfectly like her. It’ll change things that I don’t yet need changing.

“I mean, I’m not sure yet.” I mumble, growing uncomfortable with the subject.

Shisui seems to realize this and quickly drops the subject— which I’m very grateful for, though I can guess this won’t be the end of it.

“I actually found something pretty interesting while exploring earlier!” ‘Exploring’ which I guess is a new word from running away from the rest of his family.

It’s no secret that Shisui is one of the more.... stranger members of the Uchiha Clan. For one: he’s social and actually talks to the other villagers. He’s nice and not, like, super arrogant about everything which is a pretty known family trait. Then again most clans are known to be prideful but it seems those with magic eyes are more so-

As a result he is viewed as the ‘strange Uchiha’ in the village and in his own clan. He knows it, I know it, whoever he talks to knows it, and even Squirrel knows it. So he does his best to get away from the compound— whether it’s by hanging out with a six year old or traversing through the forest. So hearing that he found something new isn’t that surprising but the added fact that he wants to share it with me is.... pretty nice.

“Really?” My head turns towards where he sits, hair scraping in the blades of grass. “What’d you find?”

He smiles mischievously. “It’s a surprise!”

I huff but I’m not surprised. Instead, I nudged Squirrel awake who didn’t appreciate being woken up.

“This better not be a waste,” I say in warning, despite having an entire day to waste.

Shisui just laughs at my ‘threat’ and leads me into the forest. As we venture, different sights catch my eye. Light filters through the canopy of leaves as birds’ song fills the cooling air. Fall approaches and with it comes the browning leaves and crisp air of death. Squirrel hisses threateningly at any other animal that gets too close as if they could actually do anything. My foot trips over a protruding root and I grumble how long until we get there.

“Not to worry, Racoon-Chan,” He hums in reply, annoyingly stubborn in keeping that nickname. “We’re almost there.” Easy for him today with his graceful steps, not once tripping over a random twig like I am.

Surprisingly Shisui was telling the truth and we soon came upon a gleaming river. The water was clear enough that I could see into the bottom, where sand and rocks covered in algae peaked out. Tadpoles and small fish swim in the waters, following the water’s current.

“Woah....” I whisper, delighted by the sight. “This is awesome!”

Growing up in the city back in my old life never gave me access to this kind of thing. Sure, I’d see it on TV but my closest connection to nature is a park surrounded by concrete. To be in a world like this opens my eyes to thousands of sights to see along with the freedom to venture them.

“Glad you liked it.” I look over to see Shisui seeming quite pleased with himself as he stares into the water, scratching behind Squirrel’s ears.

“Hey, Shisui?”

He looks over at me, quirking his head to show that he’s listening. “Thank you.”

A beat. Then a smile.

“Sure thing, Sakura. ‘M glad you like it.”

  
  


Life continued and as it did the seasons turned. The air became cooler, biting to the skin. The leaves browned and fell from their branches, covering the land and providing much entertainment for other children. Parents are able to take a breath of relief as something new shows up to distract their spawns for the week

Unfortunately for my parents, I’m not going to do that. Fall leaves (hah) a bad taste in my mouth— more specifically lead. Because I died. Yeah, that’s not fun to remember. October came and passed, the village mourned and then moved on just like they do every year. My parents hold me closer than usual and keep me inside longer. I understand the difficulty of what happened and don’t mention it.

As the day comes and passes, my figurative leash loosens. And Shisui’s becomes even shorter.

We sit in the tallest tree we could’ve spotted, Squirrel on my head and leaves in Shisui’s hair. It’s silent save for the occasional breeze which brings a new flow of leaves. The great pine with its sticky sap, however, holds steady. Through its needles I spot the civilian side of the village and squint to find my home.

“Hey, Sakura?”

Quirking an eyebrow, I stop my search and peer over to Shisui. “Hm?”

“I don’t think we’ll be able to hang as much.”

My eyes widen as I stare with shock, disappointment filling my chest. I ask, desperate in my tone, “What?! Why?!”

To his credit, Shisui actually looks surprised at my reaction. Like I wasn’t supposed to ask that or wonder why or be upset that my best friend is leaving-

“I.... I’m going to be more busy with my, ah, job.” The answer worded that way because of him not being allowed to disclose private information directly, I know.

I understand at that moment he’s not trying to leave me. And even though he probably has other people in his life who also don’t want him to be put back into harm's way I feel selfish for what I ask next.

“Don’t leave me.”

I can see the way he looks troubled. The way this new awkward atmosphere forms because of my self imposed loneliness that I break anyways for the one person I shouldn’t have broken it for. Not because he’s a bad person, but because of how much damage this friendship can cause.

“I can’t promise that.” He ruffles my hair, much to my annoyance. It almost feels like he isn’t taking this seriously.

He’s the most serious one here.

The wind blows past us and I sigh with it, the bonuses traveling with the leaves.

“I know.”

He smiles and it hurts, knowing that it might not even be real. Shinobi are just good at hiding things like that.

“Do you believe in peace?”

The question is strange. The answer is rather obvious. Only madmen don’t believe in peace, but only the foolish think it costs nothing.

”I believe we can have it.” My eyes follow the flow of a blue bird, how it soars from tree to tree and in between. “But everything costs something.”

I feel my eye throb.

“For being six, you’re pretty serious,” He chuckles.

I huff and cross my arms, looking away with a blush, probably reinforcing the fact with my chubby cheeks that I’m, well, six.

“You asked!” I defend and Squirrel chitters in agreement.

“True, true,” He looks me in the eye, serious but gentle. “Do you think shinobi can bring peace?” 

My mouth is dry and the next answer doesn’t come as easily as the first. “I think anyone can bring peace..... they just need to know how.”

He hums in thought, dark eyes staring at what I think is the same bird.

“I think there are people who don’t want peace,” He sighs and suddenly I’m much more aware of how quiet this forest is and how loud we can be. And how many branches there are to eavesdrop on. My realization comes at the same moment as Shisui’s and he freezes just slightly.

“But not in our village,” He laughs and I know it’s fake.

“Of course.” Is all I manage to whisper.

Of course.

He changes the subject but not completely.

“I know I already asked but you never actually answered. Are you interested in joining the academy?”

_ Do you believe in peace? _

_ Do you think shinobi can bring peace? _

_ People who don’t want peace. _

_ It’s fake. _

**“Fix this.”**

“Yeah,” And I feel as if I sign away my life. “I think I am.”

  
  


The first frost came and, for some reason, my parents saw this as something to enjoy with the news that I want to join the academy. They bundled me in jackets and took me to the playground, a special occasion seeing as it’s all three of us. I stubbornly cling to my father's leg, refusing to be separated from one of the only people I trust.

Shisui isn’t here. Squirrel can’t be around my parents. And now said parents want me to socialize. First frost my ass this freaking sucks. Screw joining the academy if I have to deal with this.

“Honestly, Sakura,” He grunts, still trying to pry me off. “You need to talk to people.”

“Sakura.” My mother intones and my grip goes slack as my body reacts to the warning. I fall in the dirt but it’s worth what I just avoided. “Go have fun.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

I run off, hearing the next bits of their conversation. “How’d you do that?”

“Don’t ask.”

The playground is a new one, I notice, with a different set of swings and a different bunch of kids. I recognize none of the faces and the lack of familiarity doesn’t make me comfortable at all. I glance at my parents to see them caught up in conversation and decide that it’s definitely safe to slip away.

The playground borders one of Konoha’s many forests so I decided that’s a good start. Shisui and his many adventures of Dragging Me Along has dashed away any hesitance I might have had of exploring which makes it easy for me to just dive right in.

I stay close to the playground, but something takes my notice. Like a thought in the back of my head that I can’t quite grasp, some sort of presence won’t leave me alone. It’s familiar and it’s large, practically suffocating if I hadn’t encountered it before. Confused, I follow the source of where it may be coming from, a game of hot and cold as nothing but the growing presence tells me where to look until-

“Boo!”

“Ah!” I scream, swinging out.

Something hits the dirt and I gasp as I realize I just punched a child.

“Oh my god!” I drop to my knees to help him up, only to pause as I hear laughter.

“That was so much fun!” He laughed, blue eyes shining as he turned to face me. “Ya shoulda’ seen your face!”

I pause in surprise as I take in his appearance. Bright blond hair. Shocking blue eyes. Whisker cheeks.

Oh fuck I just punched Naruto Uzumaki-

He pauses confused, tilting his head in a way that shouldn’t be that fucking cute.

“Uh.... you alright there? I didn’ scare ya too hard did I?”

I snap out of it, blinking as I realize staring at him like that wouldn’t be seen as normal. “Ah-“ I clear my throat. “I- I’m fine. I just didn’t expect to see anyone out here.”

It’s then that I understand this massive presence is him and that I recognize it because of the fucking Kyubi Attack oh god-

“You talk funny.” He scrunches his face. “I’m Naruto Uzumaki! Nice to meet ya!” Unwillingly, a giggle escaped me at how freaking cute he is.

“I’m Sakura Haruno!” I smile, holding out my hand, actually feeling a little confident at this meeting. “Let’s be friends!”

“What?” He tilts his head. “I can’t be friends with a  _ girl _ .” Oh you little-

My face drops as I stare at Naruto in shock.

“What?! Why not?!” I ask loudly.

“‘Cause!” He replies just as loud if not more. “Girls are gross!”

I huff. “No, girls are cool. See? I even have a cool scar!” I point angrily at my face.

“So?” He huffs just as much. “I have scars too!” And then also points to his face where his whiskers are.

I continue to argue stubbornly, “My scar is bigger!” 

“I have more!”

I don’t want to be that person but he should be thankful I want to be friends! Actually never mind that makes me sound like a jerk. Still, I thought the anime made it clear Naruto wanted friends as a kid. Why would he turn me down?!

“Fine then,” I stand, brushing the dirt from my coat, mouth moving ahead of my brain. “If we can’t be friends then we’ll be rivals.”

“Rivals?” He narrows his eyes. “Fine. Deal. We’re rivals now and you bet I’ll beat you! Believe it!”

“No, I’ll beat you! You believe it!”

And so the moment that I have yet to realize really messes with shit ends and wow did I make a mistake.

  
  


Winter comes and December passes, the first snow falling over Konoha like a blanket refusing to let up until three weeks after. My parents call it one of the worst winters they’ve had but I recognize it as what it is. A warning from the universe that I am so ignoring cause this just proves I’m doing things in the right direction! That direction happens to be whatever isn’t canon but still! Fuck the universe!

January starts and it brings the sinking realization that so does the academy. I feel ill prepared as my parents remind me one week away from the entrance exam that I should be excited. I get to start serving my village soon. With a new vigor, I down my breakfast before breaking for it to the front door, yelling about the library.

My parents let me leave and my father is there with my coat when I run back in, shivering. “Thanks,” I manage to slip in as I run back out, heavy coat secure this time.

The streets are crowded with snow mush, sheets of ice, and other people struggling to get to where they’re going. A cool breeze lifts my hair, biting at my neck and making me wish I brought a scarf. I haven’t seen Squirrel around that much but I know it’s most likely the cold weather.

The large building of the library looms closer and I let out a breath of relief, the air blowing out in a cloud of white. I can feel the warm air already and the thought has me quickening just slightly.

My hands reach for the cold metal, now making me wish I brought gloves, as I pull open the big doors of the library and slip inside. The smell of old books fills my nose as the sudden temperature change has my once cold skin feel tingly. The sight remains the same as the first two times I traveled to the library— shelves of books filled the room, all the way to the ceiling. Each section labeled, a few with wards to keep civilians and lower ranks away from the sensitive information. Couches and chairs speckle the room, spaces out enough to make people comfortable but not enough that they feel lonely. 

A lovely little building that more than likely has very sensitive information. But that’s not why I’m here! I’m here to make sure I get into the academy!

With a new vigor, I make my way to the history section, figuring it a good idea to get that good ol’ village pride. After some extensive searching, I came up with a nice little book titled  _ History of Konoha _ . By nice I mean in bold letters and by little I mean thicker than my arm when compared. 

This..... won’t be fun at all. I hate studying. Still, if I want to hold up my word to Shisui(which really wasn’t a promise but still) I need to get into the Academy. Popping the book open, I sit in one of the secluded chairs, getting comfortable.

Thirty minutes later and I’m bored out of my mind. I have no idea why I’m reading this seeing as I watched the fucking anime and already know how the hell Konoha was formed. So instead I’m scrolling through the different sections for a better book. Like one that’ll keep me entertained!

In the end, I find a smaller book, looking to only be a good few chapters. The cover is green, with golden accents on the illustrations of different plants, the greenery curling around the title:  _ Death in the Garden _ . Oh ho ho, don’t mind if I do!

Sitting in the same seat,  _ History of Konoha _ set on the floor, I opened the new book and got started. Soon, I’m entrapped in the world of toxins and their effects, the history of their uses across the nations. The browned paper under my fingers makes it harder to read, but I manage to get through it and soon the sun was beginning to set.

I look up when I feel someone approach and sigh in disappointment. It’s the librarian and it’s time for me to go. Hopeful, I check out both books and make my way home, knowing only one out of the two I’ll be reading.

A week later I enter the academy, children shuffling with me. In the crowd I blend in, pink hair and garish scar thankfully not making me stand out.

It’s time to take the entrance exam.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will Sakura make it into the academy? Who can tell! 
> 
> I’ve always noticed that in any fic Naruto at the beginning is this shy kid, who is a little nervous around people before quickly warming up and becoming excited. So I decided to turn that on it’s head and base him more on how I know outgoing kids behave and act. 
> 
> Tell me what you think please! Your comments give me life!


	5. Tick. Tock. Goes the Clock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fuck things are a mess. Sakura can’t keep her fucking mouth shut and apparently mud can freeze. Not in that order.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: Wow I have this chapter to write, due today  
> Also me: Hehehe catch lizards 
> 
> Anyways this chapter is without my beta reader since she was busy today but will be revised tomorrow and updated with any mistakes fixed!

I was shuffled along with the other kids, being separated from the older ones who apparently have orientation the same day. The grownups, none of whom I recognize, sort us by last name but not before writing down our name, age, and answers to what I’m pretty sure was an interrogation. Asking things like our parents’ name and occupation, where we lived, the last time we shit, ect. Alright maybe one of those was an exaggeration but they were very specific questions that I’d be asking about if I had more energy to deal with some talked down and probably bullshit answers. But I don’t so I sat down next to nose picker one and nose picker two. 

The explanation started, a long speech on how the village is great and how we’ll make it greater so long as we work our absolute hardest. That we’ll be put through trial after trial but all we need to do is remember who this is for: The village and our great Hokage. By then I zone out the military indoctrination and only tune back in when I hear some….. Questionable information. More questionable than most of it, at least. 

“And the best part is that if you’re in this room you already pass! All this examination is for is so that we can properly sort you into your class!” Wait a minute-

I don’t know why but this makes me feel…. Worried. I remember how in canon it seemed there was a single class made up of clan heirs and then the extras, canon Sakura being the only civilian born kid that had any importance to plot until Sai showed up (and Sai is most definitely a special circumstance). Does this mean there’s a possibility that I’ll screw up and end up in a separate class? Not only can I see this fucking me over a whole bunch but I might even screw up canon enough that I can’t predict what’ll happen next. I can’t do that until I need to prevent fucking genocide! Which I’m still not sure on how to do…. Either way I need to somehow perfectly duplicate the way Sakura took the test or do better than that. 

Soon enough the speech is finished and we’re led out of the large room to separate classrooms. The one I’m brought to looks exactly like the one we see in Naruto's class in canon so it’s either I was brought to that specific classroom by chance or every classroom looks the same. Looking around I spot a familiar looking puppy and decide from there it doesn't actually matter. Unfortunately, I get no chance to talk to Kiba because I’m instantly sat down. Simple rules are explained to us: No cheating, no interrupting, and don’t get up until the exam is finished. We get one hour and afterwards we’ll be going outside for a physical orientation. 

At the sign of start we flip over our papers and begin on our test. The questions were mostly theoretical, asking us what to do in certain situations. An enemy comes at you and bla bla bla all I need to do is put the obvious answer. I choose to regroup with my teammates, I retreat, I do whatever the fuck doesn’t get me killed or fired. It feels almost boring until they start asking more…. Ethical question. Hostage situations and choosing your teammate over the mission. Lead is heavy in my stomach as I write the answers of what they want to hear in my neatest writing. The clock continues to tick on the wall as my stress ticks in my head. The questions get more personal, worded in such a way that the one taking it is almost compelled to choose the answer they want to hear.

_ ‘You’re made to choose between your family and your village-’ _

A bead of sweat rolls down my forehead and the sound of pencils scribbling continues around me. The clock ticks and somewhere in the room someone mutters something under their breath only to be shushed. My mouth is dry and tastes like the acids in my stomach as I continue to write answer after answer. The eyes on me and hidden presences in the room has me keeping still and carefully blank.

_ Scribble scribble _

_ Tick- _

_ ‘You encounter foreign nin while off duty-’ _

_ Scribble scribble _

_ Tock _

_ ‘A teammate betrays the village-’ _

_ Scribble scribble _

_ Mutter _

_ Tick- _

_ “Shh!” _

_ ‘You run out of rations while out of the village on a mission-’ _

_ Scribble scribble  _

_ Tock  _

_ ‘Why do you need to be a shinobi?’ _

_ Tick- _

“Alright, pencils down!” The voice of the examiner rings throughout the room and just like that everything stops but the passage time. The last question and all I have is three words.  _ ‘I want to-’ _

“Oh come on, I didn’t finish!” A random voice rings out and I can breath again. Similarly, other kids voice their complaints and it’s with a start that I come to the realization I was one of the few that made it that far. 

“I only got to question twenty eight!” 

‘You are low on weapons and-’

“I got to seventeen!”

‘It is time to pack for a mission-’

I realize hardly any of these kids would be used to this kind of schooling where they’re given a long test with a limited amount of time. None of them had been conditioned the way I have to work without breaks from question to question in fear of not finishing the test and getting half of it wrong and ultimately failing. Not only that but they already know they’ll pass so why bother?

“Ah, no worries!” The man in the front smiles but it looks off. Wrong. Fake. “You already passed! This is just for your placement in classes, remember? Now, please file out in an orderly fashion. It’s time for the physical exam!” 

Just like that the outrage stops and the children calm enough in order to file out in what is certainly not a formal order. Honestly it’s whatever so I do the same as the chattering children around me. We’re led out to the main hall where it’s a tight squish for all the other kids just finishing their test as well. Similarly, all they talk about is how they haven't finished their test and that’s it’s simply outrageous they weren’t given enough time. If they listened close enough they’d also hear the snickering of a few of the teachers. 

Outside the crisp January air meets the group of children and immediately I regret not bringing a jacket from inside. A shiver runs up my spine as we wait in the cold for the grown ups to finish talking. The children receive a new thing to complain about and I’m inclined to agree if it wasn’t for the fact going into this profession will most certainly give us more hardships than a little chill. 

“Time to get to work! First we’ll have a three lap run and then split you all in pairs of two for team exercises! Gather by that tree and go when I give the signal!” The instructor for the physical exam finally says I really love how she uses words like ‘we’ despite the fact only us children will be running these laps. 

Once lined up I wearily take notice of the frozen puddles of mud that look like no fun to run into. They line the path around the yard where we’ll be running, some obvious obstacles. Still, the children around me look excited as if this is some game and not what will decide how we’re educated for the next few years. Then again it’s kinda hard for them to realize that…. 

My thoughts are interrupted by a shrill whistle and just like that the group of children are on their way. As most things in life things start out easy and predictable. The rowdy kids begin to race each other, the kids desperate to join also blow their energy, normal kids stay with the group, and the slow and one’s wanting to conserve energy stay in the back. I have yet to determine whether I’m slow or just want to conserve my energy so I’ll say it’s the latter to sound smarter. 

We pass the first round of frozen puddles, about an eighth of the way done with the first lap and I start to believe I can actually do this. I feel like I have more stamina than I normally would and along with that- 

Immediately my chain of thought is cut off as a pair of hands push on my shoulder. As if I’m slow motion, I see a frozen mud puddle come closer. Closer. Closer. Clo- I feel the cold, harsh and biting against my skin. The grainy dirt filled my mouth and the shock of it had tears brought to my eyes. A few snickers passed by and I’m brought enough out of my shock that I’m being left behind. No one looks back and with quickening breath, I stand on freezing and shaking legs to try and catch up. 

I came in last of course, never really able to catch up. The worst part was that I could feel the stares of the teachers. How they judged me and just watched as it happened. On my way past the group of children, one shoved me as he too walked by. 

_ “Freak.” _

My face burned and so did my hatred. 

The rest of the physical test went by unremarkably. The girl I was paired with looked pityingly at my dirty state and I also noticed her own shins covered in mud. We took turns counting each other's sit ups, jumping jacks, and push ups we completed in a minute. The girl, who introduced herself Gin “no last name, please”, did significantly better than me, of course. She didn’t look mocking or prideful about it though and for that I’m thankful. Afterwards we filed back inside, collected our things, and was told we’d be informed on our results once school starts in two weeks before being promptly kicked out. 

Other kids file out around me, through the courtyard and to their awaiting parents of siblings. I stop trying to look for familiar faces as I spot a lone wooden swing, hanging from a tree. Half of the seat is on the ground, rope snapped. The swing is broken. 

With a great shuttle wracking my body, I move on. The same sound chimes in my head. 

_ Tick- _

_ Tock _

  
  


Three days before the start of the academy, almost two weeks after I came home covered in mud, Squirrel returned. Their tail is rougher, the hair now in patches and they’re missing an eye. After months of not seeing them, once my eyes caught sight, I began to cry. After a sufficient amount of strangulation and eye watering occurred, we moved outside to the still chilly village in order to not get caught by my parents. 

“I’m never letting you away again if you plan on scaring me like that,” I joke hoarsely, eyes still red as Squirrel wraps themself around my neck, laying on my shoulders. 

They chitter tiredly and the worry of how long squirrels live is once again brought to attention. I know the Naruto world is special and chakra should help them live longer but- 

Normally two to three years if your memory serves correctly. 

My mouth feels dry as the cold continues to surround me, the only warmth coming from Squirrel and the coat I’m wearing. Practically on autopilot, I pass by the different villages, making my way into the forest as Squirrel chatters on, seemingly telling me about their time away. Humming a little, I pause as I feel something. Not a pair of eyes or anything but a sort of…. presence that exists stronger than the nature around me. Two, in fact. Located at the place I’m going. Sinfully curious, I continue forward until I hear a voice. 

Once I start hearing it, though, it stops and I’m left wondering if I imagined it. The two presences move a tad bit, just in time for me to arrive at the river and see nothing but the cold, clear water. The presences vanish but a pair of eyes appear and a shiver runs up my spine. Following from where I last felt it, I jump in surprise once my green meets black. 

“Shisui? Why are you hiding in a bush?” I ask, recognizing those eyes. Shisui stands, staring at me as if he wasn’t hiding in a bush. 

“Hey, Sakura, what are you doing around here?” Yes a totally normal conversation going on as someone else hides beside him in the same bush. 

My eyebrow remains raised. “Squirrel came back and we wanted to visit the river. Who’s that person beside you?”

Someone else raises beside him, blank faced as Shisui blinks in surprise. Also looking as if he wasn’t previously hiding in a bush is Itachi fucking Uchiha and damn how come neither of them have leaves in their hair. They don’t even look cold! 

“Squirrel came back?” Shisui steps out from behind the bush, very much changing the subject. 

“Ah-“ My eyes remain on Itachi— who is still standing in the bush— “Yeah. They just showed up this morning- hey, why were you in a bush?” Two can play at the changing subjects thing. 

Shisui decides laughing it off seems like a good idea. “Thought you were just someone passing by and Itachi and I didn’t wanna get interrupted.” 

I blink up at him as he smiles down at me. “So you hid in a bush.”

“Yep.”

_ Blink _

_ Smile _

_ Stare _

“Alright, whatever,” I sigh, moving to sit by the water. “It’s good to see you again, I guess.”

“Aww, so sweet, Racoon- Chan!” He coos, parting my head and definitely not acting suspicious. “I heard you just took the entrance exam too!”

At the mention of that day, something curls in my chest. Still, I force out an awkward chuckle, scratching the back of my head. “Yeah— turns out it was really just a placement exam and we already passed.”

Shisui and Itachi— who at some point came over to us, what the fuck— exchanged a glance for some fucking reason. Honestly, they don’t need to make me more suspicious. 

“Really?” He leans against my head, totally casual and definitely not Up To Something. “What’d you think?” 

I do a little half shrug, eyes trained on the water. “Dunno. Little weird, I guess. The questions got kinda personal but that’s indoctrination… for… ya.” I pause as I realize my mistake in words, eyes kept on the current, suddenly cold under my coat. 

_ Fuckfuckfuckity FUCK. Why are you such an idiot- _

Risking a glance, I feel myself freeze at the look in Shisui’s eyes. It’s far different than the normal look. With just a single word I somehow manage to ruin everything. Or at least I think.

“That’s quite the word there, Sakura.”

My breathing stops. “Yeah? I- ah- heard the examiners use… it.” I’m never a good liar and even as the deceit spills from my lips I stumble and catch myself. He obviously won’t be believing me but his reaction is left to be determined.

“That’s quite a strange thing for them to mention.” A new voice joins the mix and if I wasn’t so terrified I might be crying. How the hell could I forget the fact Itachi is here as well?

“Yep-” Whoop time for more panic. “Whats it mean?” Totally innocent question in poor grammar is definitely going to make me less suspicious.

“What do you think it means?” Shisui tilts his head, which really just has me feeling more like this will be my last conversation ever. Despite not moving at all, the two Uchiha corner me, now preparing to strike.

“Ah-- Well in means to enter, right?” Just break the word down. “Doc is short for document. I don’t really know what trin means... “ Not able to hold eye contact, my gaze returns to the clear water. “Ation is sorta like an action? So… I guess it’s entering to take a document-- as in a test-- and then doing an action later.” What kind of bullshit. 

_ Tick- _

_ Tock _

“Like the written exam and the physical exam… we… took…” The more I talk, the more my voice filters to become more silent. “Right?”

“Sure,” Shisui finally concedes and that sweet, sweet oxygen finally enters in my lungs again. “Though, Sakura, I really suggest you work on your lying.” Never mind. Not suffocating has left the chat. 

I remain still as Shisui stands (When did he sit down?) and brushes the dirt from his pants. “Don’t look like that,” He says in amusement. “It’s no crime for me to be aware. Just be careful who you let know that, ‘kay? ‘Specially our in the open”

“M’kay,’ I squeak. 

“Great, see you around, Racoon- Chan!” And just like that the two were gone, presence and all.

For a while I stay silent, cold chilling me to my bones. Squirrel chitters, nipping and pulling my hair to see if I’m okay. They stayed silent throughout the entire ordeal so it’s understandable they’re worried. A breeze blows past and we both shiver simultaneously. Coming to my senses, I stand.

“I’m fine,” I whisper. Whether that’s to Squirrel or myself is yet to be said.

_ ‘I hope.’ _ Is left unsaid, though I hear it clear as day.

_ Tick- _

_ Tock _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who liked the mind fuckery?  
> Any theories on what the fuck is going on with Sakura? They might be obvious who fucking knows. Not me! I’m just interested in hearing what y’all think! 
> 
> I know it’s shorter than normal but damn writers block is hitting me hard- 
> 
> Thank you for reading!


	6. First Day of School.... Yikes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nightmares! That only you will remember! Also the realization that Sakura is, in fact, a smol child does more affect than expected by anyone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My continuation of being bad at chapter summaries continues. Anywhoo, we’re drawing closer to some lovely plot things that will cause anyone problems! Remember our lovely motto: Fuck Off Danzo!

_ ‘Screaming. It’s all I could hear for miles and miles, echoing down the expanse of halls. A voice is yelling over the speakers, but I can hardly hear it over the ringing in my ears. I see him, standing as frozen as I am and all I can manage is the realization how small he is. How the blood splattered across his face and the emptiness in his eyes is just a bit too wrong. Shouldn’t they be lit up? They just were. Smiling and talking because it’s the first day and I was just so proud of him for skipping a grade. _

_ Standing and breathing turns to be another mistake. The halls turn silent as the running and screaming leave just as fast as the bullet in that gun. It tears through my chest, through flesh and bone and next the only thing I can realize is how much that hurt. It hurts and I can’t breath and I think maybe something is there? _

_ A figure shroud in darkness, orange, molten lava for eyes behind bedrock. I try to tell it to run. Or to help him. “Help….” _

_ Help yourself. _

_ Help Him. _

_ Help- _

_ All I get is another shot sounding, drumming, circling around the ringing in my head. I can think of nothing else as the figure is forgotten along with his empty eyes, nothing but how hard it is to breathe, thick liquid bubbling from my burning throat. I can’t see and that’s what leaves me first. _

_ Tick- _

_ Tock _

_ A feeling of falling as my stomach drops to a lower fall. I’m sinking, down, down, down the rabbit hole. I can’t think and I can’t think and I can’t think despite the same sound rumbling throughout my being. The metronome of sound, ever constant around the crowded yet empty place I am. Who am I, anyways? The feeling of forgetting and slipping within the ever constant chime grows stronger with ever rumble sounding throughout my soul. It tells me to let go and I’m inclined to listen as it wraps about me. I’m so close and… why was I… even… worried? _

_ Dead, empty, dark eyes. They have me gasping to fight, to help him and get back. The beat around me turns from luling to commanding, suppressing. If I could cry I'm sure I would as it shocks me and any sense of life that I had left to hang on. I grasp tightly onto what I have, fighting back, kicking, screaming, yelling offbeat and refusing to follow along. I can’t forget him, I can’t forget them, I refuse to forget myself.  _

_ The sound shatters around me, a broken clock screaming back at the beat Iset for my own. This constant battle between nothing and everything, trouble for all involved. All is involved, everything as I remain stubborn because I need to remember! I need to…. Stop whispering that it’s actually a want…. Stop it. I can’t give up… the sound is yelling at me but I can hardly hear anymore. Hear it over… something. This feels so annoying and…. How long have I been here? _

**_“Such a hassle,”_ ** _ Something booms around me, clicking in it’s own ticks and tocks as the source of what I once fought.  _ **_“But you’ll do. Fix this.”_ **

_ Fix what I have done, have started, have ruptured. I hadn’t realized…. I just wanted him safe…. _

_ And then I’m falling again, drowning in blood and lava. It burns my skin and freezes my outside, taking my soul and shoving it in something it doesn’t belong. I continue to fight as I change, something new overtaking me. It’s not right but it’s also not wrong. I can taste ash and fire despite never having once been in contact. Something sears on my skin, bubbling and scarring and it doesn’t let me die again. I’m torn this way and that yet everything is confusing, changing how I am and what I think. I pay no mind, however, because the pain is much greater than the previously shocking lead in my chest that felt like it was from forever ago. I hear screaming again but this one takes on a new sort of terror and pain. It’s mine. _

_ I’m falling again, the scene changed from fire and ash to fields of green and tall trees. It’s cold as I hit numbingly cold mud, freezing my insides to hatred. I stand and try to rejoin the group but every step I take has me going backwards. There’s nothing soon but white as my running turns to walking turns to stopping. The laughter of children and chirping of birds fade out as I see nothing. I walk in the vast emptiness of the room. It’s all but everything, only nothing and white. I shiver at the cold and continue my walking once again. _

_ Tick- _

_ Tock _

_ Only the sound of my echoing feet, sounding throughout nothing and echoing off of something that was never there. It’s bright and white, blinding almost to just one eye. I close the right eye, my burned left staying as it is, wide and opened. The echoing of my steps follows me and comes to a stop as I stare at the only other thing in there. Tall and imposing, something I always found comfort now has me shivering. A tree stood there, misplaced in the white room. I’ve seen this tree before and it’s impossible not to know where with the swing attached to it. A plank of wood, held up by rope. _

_ The swing is broken, half of it on the ground. I scream.’ _

I jolt screaming, a fire burning around me as something tangles between my legs trapping me. My voice hoarse as it becomes harder to breathe, my eyes watering. The terrified song ringing in the air as everything stifles in flames and heat, smoke and ash, burning, burning. Something bangs against the wall and I flinch violently, still screaming. Something is grabbing me, holding me down, heavier than the lead trapped in my chest. 

“-KURA!”

Brighter and brighter, louder and louder I feel like I’m drowning underneath all of the ash. It’s becoming increasingly hard to intake any air as my throat becomes more strained.

“SAKURA!”

A yell and I’m snapped out of my own mind. Looking around frantically, I breathe heavily to see my room perfectly intact. There’s no smoking gun or raging fire, only my mother breathing heavily. She grasps at my shoulders, almost painfully, green eyes wild as she stares at me in worry.

“I-” I choke out, vocal cords rubbing against themselves. “T-the fire-” I sob and my mother traps me in a hug.

I hold onto her, sobbing desperately despite how hot I am. A glance out the window shows it’s still dark outside and when straining my ears enough I hear the chattering of birds. “The bullets-”

“Sakura,” She pets my hair, fingers running through each sweaty strand. “You’re here right now.” Even with her words my chest feels filled with the lead bullets, their continuous sound of their bang echoing in my ears. They weigh me down, having it increasingly harder to breathe. “Breath, dear.”

_ Tick- _

_ Tock _

It chimes in my head, that sound from the classroom and from my dream. Even as I try to search my memory, however, I can only come up with the same sound and empty, empty eyes. Dark and lost, lifeless with nothing left. A shell that once contained life now with nothing else. It’s seared behind my eyelids, burned there for anytimes I close my eyes. 

My breathing slowly steadied as I relaxed more in my mother’s arms, head buried in her chest. As always she has that strange, unexplainable mom smell that simply reminds you of home. My tears begin to slow, sobbing subsiding to chest wracking hiccups. Quick breaths overtake me, uncontrollable gulps of air that always come after any crying session. My mother continues to hold me, rocking me as she hums a nameless lullaby. 

“It’s three in the morning,” She whispers without spite, only informing me of the happenings. “The academy starts today. I think you should get some more sleep, okay?”

I pull away from the hug, her arms still wrapped around me as I look into her worried green eyes with my reddening ones that match her color. “Don’t leave?” I tentatively request, afraid of the loneliness that could settle in my chest. 

Still, my mother smiles gently and nods, maneuvering us onto the bed. I’m still wrapped in her arms, head tucked under her chin as her breathing steadies into sleep. My eyes remain opened in the dim dark, mind unable to settle apart from what little I can remember from the dream. I assume it must have been scary seeing how loudly I was screaming but…. Maybe not the sort of scary I’d normally think of. It feels closer to the scary of floating in a vast body of water, seeing nothing but the liquid and clear blue sky. A beautiful and relaxing atmosphere if it wasn’t for the piling dread of what I can’t see under the water. A fear of the unknown.

A shiver wracks my body and I bury myself closer to my mother, taking comfort in the safety of her arms. Unconsciously she holds me tighter and the action brings a new type of tears to my eyes. We stay like that, her asleep and me lost in thought until the sun rises, its bright light streaming through the window and casting my room in a golden glow. 

I rise carefully, sliding from her arms out from under the covers as my bare feet reach the cold floor. They pad against the wooden planks, carefully quiet as I rummage through my drawers for the previous outfit I decided on the previous night. Once retrieved, I make my way past the already opened door, wincing as I remember how it banged open just a few hours ago. I make my way to the bathroom down the hall, house serenely quiet in the face of only me being awake.

Closing the bathroom door I prepare for the day. It feels like the first day of school, that unique feeling of anxiety in my gut. It's reminiscent of my old life and how those years felt centuries behind me, almost as if it;s a work of fiction made up in my brain. For a bit, I stare at my reflection, obscured in the foggy mirror. My scar sticks out like a sore thumb, garish against my face which still holds baby fat. I’m still only seven, only that old in this life despite my matured brain trapped in this form. And all too suddenly I feel so small, standing on my tippy toes and leaning on the sink just to get a glimpse of my face in the steamy bathroom on the first day of school. With a heavy chest, I lean back and pad out of the bathroom, feet still damp from the wet tile.

Down the stairs and to the kitchen, the open space lit from the window above the sink, sunlight streaming in. Birds chirp outside the window as my little steps pad over to the stove, lifting the kettle with both hands to fill it with water. Heaving back to it’s burning and starting the gas, I stare at my pudgy, child fingers. Only now I’m seeing how small I look and feel. It’s as if I’m looking through a VR from the point of view as a small child. Except I’m not in VR because this is real and I’m not just the point of view of a small child because holy hell this is real.

Suppressed feelings of shock come about me as my mind reacts to this new change with more change. Shaking my head in an attempt to physically be rid of this stupid new feeling, I’m all too aware of my body and how it moves as I heat up last nights dinner. Just before the kettle begins to scream, I take it off the heat and pour myself a cup of chai, the scent of spice filling the air. Slowly I eat in the stilled house, only pausing once the sound of creaking floorboards sound above me. I know that must be Dad seeing as their room is just above the kitchen in this two story house. 

Putting my dishes in the sink and downing the rest of my tea, I relish in the next few seconds of content silence despite how the tea felt against my still sore throat. With a sigh, quick and clipped, I make my way to the front door. Shoes on and satchel picked out specifically for school slung across my body, I pause hearing heavy steps travel down the stairs.

Turning, I catch sight of my father’s blue eyes, still fogged with sleep. He pauses as well and for only a beat we stare at one another, him on the stairs and me in front of our front door. Birds continue to tweet their lovely chimin songs as he then smiles, sleepiness leaving from behind his gaze.

“Have a good first day, Sakura. I’m proud of you.” Funny how you never know you need to hear something until you hear it. 

“Thanks, dad. See you when I get back.” And then I’m out the door, greeting the bright sun by shielding my eyes from it. I shiver from the change of temperature, the late January weather sinking into my skin. The exhale of air that leaves my lips has a cloud of white blow out around my face. My nose turns rosy as I breath steadily in, chest puffed up as I begin my way to the academy, tiny feet carrying my way there. 

  
  


I arrive early, only a small number of children mill about the place. In front of the door stands a man with a clipboard, directing any child that goes up to him on where to go. The sky has long since turned from its painted pink to a bright blue, now fully waking the world. I linger by the front gate, worry bubbling in my chest, clanking uncomfortably with lead bullets. 

Tiny claws dig at my shoulder and I squeak, only managing to just stop myself from smacking Squirrel off. They chitter in what I’ve already recognized as amusement as I huff in annoyance, glaring without any heat. 

“You have the worst timing,” I mutter, looking away. They continue to chitter on, crawling their way underneath my hair to loung on my shoulder. I feel a gentle nibble on my shoulder and bite my tongue as Squirrel sends encouragement. 

“You know you can’t come with me,” I say fondly, stroking their head. In return, Squirrel only chitters faster, climbing down my arm. I wince in pain but pause to scold them as I see them squeeze into my satchel. 

“.....You’re ridiculous.” 

All I’m met is with their signature amused chittering. I sigh and accept my fate, moving past the gate in order to be sorted, but not before whispering a warning of staying quiet. 

Clutching the strap of my satchel, I stand in front of the man with the clipboard, who looked like he’d rather be anywhere but here. Not looking up from his book, I have to clear my throat, the sound awkwardly catching in my throat and sticking there. 

“Hm?” He looks down with blank eyes, meeting my gaze. Muddy brown eyes, glazed with a lack of imagination. “Last name.” 

“Ah- Haruno.” 

“Age.”

“S-Seven.” Why is it getting harder to talk? What is this sickening feeling in my stomach as my mouth fills with spit? 

The man flips through different pages clipped on his board, eyes blank. His hand trails down the ink, careful to see where he’s looking. 

“Haruno Sakura. Room 1-D.” After talking, he makes a small shooing motion. 

Startling, my voice is caught in my throat and all I can do is give a small bow before I stumble my way down the hall. It doesn’t take long to figure out I’m practically hopelessly lost, no signs in existence to indicate which way I’m supposed to go. A slow panic makes its way up my throat, grasping at my windpipe and making it that much harder to breathe. 

I stumble, foot catching as I lean against the wall, Squirrel peeking their head from my satchel. Looking around, they chitter before hopping out, making their way down the hall. In a very reminiscent way of that day of the tea shop, I ran after. Tiny feet pound on the wooden planks, following after a mischievous squirrel who, for once, only wants to help. 

Hall after hall, turn after turn, wood blends together and the small hope of not getting caught slips in my mind. Finally, we stop, Squirrel chattering proudly in front of a door labelled 1-D as I lean tiredly against the wall, trying to catch my breath. 

Not waiting for me to calm down, they climb up my leg and back into the satchel. Once again alone, I slowly straighten up, heart still beating out of my chest. Looking from side to side in the empty hall, my hand reaches for the door before opening it and walking in, deciding to just rip the bandaid off.

….before promptly running into someone else. Our heads clack painfully against the other, balance lost as pain blooms. We both groan on the floor, clutching our head. 

“What was that for!” An angry voice demands, recovering faster. 

My head still throbs as I sit up, squinted eyes meeting a familiar blue that stares at me accusingly. Why do I continue running into Naruto? 

“It’s not my fault!” I argue back, just as equally annoyed. 

“Yeah, well-“ He pauses, blinking. Squinting his eyes, he leans forward. “Hey, I know you!” He points at me. “You’re that girl from the forests! A rival.” He says matter of factly but there’s just one thing missing. 

“Did you forget my name?!” I stand, glaring.

“What!” He sputters. “ No I didn’t! You’re, ah. You’re….” 

“You did, didn’t you!”

“Well it’s not like you remember my name!” 

“Unlike you I can actually remember things!” I huff, crossing my arms.  _ Not to mention the fact this universe revolves around him. _ “You’re Naruto!” 

“Well-“

“Ah…” A new voice interrupts and I only then realize we’re not the only two in the room. Looking over, I see a third person who I recognize from the exam. 

“Oh… ah, Gin, right?” Gin “no last name, please.” 

“Right,” She nods, still looking wearily between the two of us. “Sakura, right?”

I nod as well, smiling awkwardly despite Naruto’s grumbling of how that was exactly what he thought it was. “Sakura Haruno.” I repeat, adjusting my satchel and feeling Squirrel shuffle around in there. 

Thinking there’s a third person in the room, I look around only to pause. “Huh…” I say, confused. 

“What is it?” Gin blinks. 

“I just thought there was another person here. Say, where’s the teacher?”

“Not sure-“

“I was gonna go find him!” Naruto interrupts. “At least before you ran into me!”

“Hey, you ran into me!” 

“You ran into each other!” Gin pulled us away from the other, huffing in annoyance. “Now go sit down and quit arguing!” 

Naruto, of course, goes to argue. “But-“ 

Gin’s fierce glare shut him up and, wow, for being a child she can be pretty scary. Looking into her eyes, I shiver as I’m reminded of something. 

Dead, dark eyes. 

Blinking, I shake my head and just like that the image is gone. And, yeah, while her eyes are dark they’re certainly not dead. They still hold life and oh fuck she’s glaring at me-

“I’m going!” I hold up my hands, rushing to the seat next to Naruto, despite his grumblings. Nodding once, Gin took a seat next to us as well, me in the middle with Naruto closest to the window. Looking around, I can see that this classroom also looks like the one from the anime. So, unless I was brought to the same classroom twice, it’s probable all of these classrooms are the same. 

Stewing in my thoughts, I light up at the realization I must have made it! I managed to get into Rookie Nine’s class! Smiling to myself, I rock in my seat, excited as more children follow in. Gradually, I wait for the other’s, glad I’ll still be able to tell what will happen at least until the coming massacre. 

Even the thought of the possibilities of thousands dead doesn’t put a damper on my mood, smiling to myself as I try to figure out who would come in next. Maybe Ino? She always seemed punctual and responsible in the anime so that might be from childhood. I know Shikamaru would be last, of course, seeing as he’s always defined as lazy. And I figure Choji would come in with him…. Oh I know! Shino would definitely be coming in as one of the firsts seeing as he’s characterized as punctual. 

And yet, as the classroom films, no one else makes an appearance. I see a boy who looks similar to Sasuke but he could just be an Uchiha… and no matter how long I wait, I never catch sight of Hinata’s distinct lavender eyes or Kiba and his adorable pup. The teacher reveals herself in a puff of smoke, much to the cheer and clapping of the children around me. 

I can’t bring myself to join them. Silent and horrified, I feel the crushing anxiety and worry as I realize just how wrong this is. The teacher goes on to explain to us how the rest of our time here will go, but my ears are ringing and anything she says I don’t understand. It’s becoming harder to breathe in this too big seat which dwarfs my small fork. 

“And remember!” The teacher who is not Iruka exclaims. “This is all for your village!” 

Gin notices my panic and taps my arm, my green eyes meeting her own dark ones. Dark but not dead. I can’t speak, face frozen in shock. 

“Serve it well!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oooh ~spooky~  
> Yeah so I put in one(1) original character that has plot importance because I literally couldn’t think of any other character with no last name other than Sai and Tenten who wouldn’t be in Sakura’s class for their own reasons. Yeah Naruto’s consistency of putting value on the way you were born is hindering me greatly but that brings way to our other motto: Fuck Off Cannon! 
> 
> Oh yeah you’ll never know what this means until you do but if you happen to comment please put either number: 4 or 8  
> I’m not telling you what it means until it comes up and Istg if you put some smart ass number like 13 I’ll make the results worse
> 
> Current feel: listening to Escapism as I write the scene in the kitchen


	7. Bruises and Toxins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Blood and teachers and blood and papers and bruises with toxins and iron in her mouth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: This chapter contains heavy physical bullying and death of an unknown character. It contains blood and a character being physically hurt over and over again so if you can’t handle that I suggest you skip to the bottom where I’ll provide a summary for the chapter!

A clock on the wall stood out against the rest of the wood. A simple, round clock, framed in black that had nothing to stop it. My eyes were trained on the thin second hand, thoughtless wonders of it simply snapping running through my head. How the plastic would snap in two, clean and precise. How the sound it would make, small or loud, would ring throughout the room, quick and simple. Maybe a few people would jump and maybe a few would send me a weird glance. But I still knew, even if I snapped that small piece of plastic with a quick movement of my wrists, that the passage of time would continue on.

_Tick-_

_Tock_

I feel frozen as life continues on without me, only the continuous counting of seconds grabbing me by the throat and dragging me along, my toes scraping against the ground. The constant feeling of wrong wrapped around me, holding me, hugging me, suffocating me. It’s too hard to breathe as the weight on my chest continues to hold me down in a life of water.

I’m shocked out of it, a single warm droplet of red landing on my nose as I feel a warm touch on my too cold hand. A breath of air is caught in my throat and I turn to see the dark, worried eyes of someone else. It takes a few moments for me to understand who they belong to, but by then her lips had already moved.

“I’m sorry what?” And sound returns, the chattering and movement of other children around me.

“I asked if you were okay or not…. You’ve been quiet since the start of class,” Gin repeats, voice painfully young as it reaches my ears.

I shake my head, taking in a deep breath of unfamiliar scents. “Ah- yeah just my, um, nervousness.” I try to accent my words with a smile, hoping the beating of my heart isn’t as loud as it is in my own ears.

“Oh, then I get it!” Gin giggles childishly, dark eyes sparkling. “First day at the academy and all!”

I appreciate that she’s trying and a slow smile pulls at my lips. Despite my past with other children I think that, maybe, this year will be better. I start to say something but the words are caught in my mouth, swallowed down in a big gulp as someone else approaches.

“Hello, girls!” It’s the teacher, smiling wide. “I just wanted to make sure you two were settling in nicely to the new environment!”

Gin goes on to chatter away with how she’s feeling and how excited she is, reminding me of a small child going on about their new favorite thing. I stay silent, instead taking in the appearance of our new teacher. Shortly cropped, dirty blond hair frames her round face and a splatter of freckles are painted across her cheeks. Warm brown eyes look bored as she listens to Gin go on and a shiver runs down my spine at how unfitting it goes with that smile. The gaze turns to me and I freeze up, the slightest hope that she believes I’m simply shy bargig in and taking root.

“And how about you, dear?” She tilts her head.

“I- ah- I’m excited!” I stutter out, smiling nervously. The hands in my lap fiddle with the hem of my shirt. “I never thought I’d do something like…. This.”

“Aww, that’s great to hear!” She patted my head,“Just so you remember, I’m Azamuki- Sensei, alright?”

I nod and try to match the smile, though it feels not quite right. My still chubby cheeks pulled just a bit too far and my eyebrows a bit too furrowed. Azamuki- Sensei doesn’t say anything else and just moves onto the next child. Gin doesn’t say anything else, only sending me a worried glance to which I replied with a smile.

Our first day at the academy comes to a close not with a bang but the tolling of bells in the distance. Azamuki- Sensei pauses what she was previously saying (Something about the different jobs of a ninja and the system of command in the village) and smiles before releasing us from the class with directions to bring back an explanation of something we found interesting. Other children joined our class, mostly talking about how nothing was done today.

“Nuh uh!” Came the deafening voice of Naruto who seemingly has no understanding of socializing and not butting in on conversations he’s not a part of. “We did a buncha things today! Azamuki- Sensei gave us lots to do an’ stuff!”

Other children huff and look away, a few even going as far to corner a few of my classmates to confirm the seemingly unfair truth. Because how dare one class of students get a better education than the rest (Alright that’s a fair thing to be upset about but still-). Unfortunately, I spot Gin being one of the ones kept back and yeah normally that little pull in my chest says to go home but right now all I can think about is how much larger that other boy is.

“What do you want me to tell you?” Gin’s annoyed voice came closer as I continued to push past the thick wall of children going the other way. “I don’t even know whether or not we learned more, Naruto can just be exaggerating.”

“I don’t care if he’s exaggerating or not, I’m sure you’re lying!” Another voice, this one probably belonging to the boy that dragged Gin off.

“Get your hand off of my shoulder.”

“What are you gonna do about it!” Finally, the flow of children thinned just enough for me to escape and catch Gin punching that boy in the stomach. My mouth remains agape as I see a much larger boy on the ground, clutching at his midsection as a much smaller little girl stepped over him in annoyance.

“Oh, Sakura,” Gin blinks innocently as if what’s behind her isn’t actually behind her. “Didn’t see you there. Anything I can help you with?”

“You-” I try to get a grasp on what’s happening. “How did you even-?”

“Hm?” She tilts her head, turning behind her before her eyes lit in realization. “Oh! Yeah, he was pretty annoying.”

That’s not… what I meant. Either Gin realizes what I was trying to say or she’s very oblivious on what is and isn’t normal for an about seven year old girl to do. Like sending a boy to his knees in pain. In short I don’t have enough energy to deal with any of that.

“....Never mind. Hey, would you, ah, like to go to my house?” I ask nervously because I think this might just be my first friend my age. “For the assignment!” I explain quickly after I realize I never said why.

Gin blinks. “I…. guess? You don’t gotta act so suspicious about it.” She smiles and I really hope that was a joke.

I wish my stupid child brain wasn’t so fucking stupid because I’m mentally seventeen with some added years and there’s no way a seventeen year would get this nervous when talking to a little girl ten years younger. Still, no matter how much I lecture myself that feeling this way is stupid and dumb, I remain the same nervous Sakura. My voice is caught in my throat and I nod once before leading the way home.

“Sakura?” Gin asks as we travel down one of the off to the side dirt paths that is far enough away from people. I look behind my shoulder and raise an eyebrow. “There’s something in your bag.”

My eyes widen. “Squirrel!”

Gin jumps in surprise but I pay no mind as I open my satchel to find Squirrel looking as if they were only just waking up. Ignoring Gin’s gaping, I scoop them up and grin happy. “Hello, sleepy head!”

“You just-” Gin interrupts looking from me to Squirrel to the satchel and then back to me. “Did you have a squirrel in there the entire time?”

“....In my defence they wanted to go.”

A beat after my last words and Gin breaks out in a flurry of giggles, eyes wide and still disbelieving. “My gods-” She gasped. “Why is that so funny-”

“I don’t know?” Her laughter is contagious and soon I’m giggling along, the joy choking out of my throat and to the air. Squirrel chitters in annoyance at being woken up and climbs to my head, still looking tired as they daze there.

A new air of comfortability surrounds us as we continue our walk, chattering about what we thought about Azamuki- Sensei or why we joined the academy. Gin seemed very interested in Squirrel which is completely understandable seeing as they are adorable and came out of a bag.

“And then he just dunked me in the-”

My entire world shifts perspectives as the air is knocked out of me. My back hurts and someone is holding me down and I’m scared and I can’t breathe- There’s more noise around me but the blossoming pain in the back of my head is getting pretty hard to ignore.

“THEY’RE TAKING THEM!” The man on top of me screams, red eyes wide as spittle hits my face. Fear keeps me grounded and I’m screaming too. I think I hear Gin but it’s hard to tell with all the noise around me. “ALL OF THE-”

The man is cut off by his own blood. It bubbles out of his mouth, dripping to his chin and on my face. It feels warm. My own screams are caught in my throat as the man slumps and why is he doing that? He’s still warm. He’s still warm but he’s not breathing.

“.....Huh?” I try to understand what’s going on but it’s getting harder to breathe with this new weight. The stickiness on my face is quick to cool, a phantom feeling of warmth left behind. My back scrapes against the ground as someone slides me out from under the man but all I can focus on is how empty those eyes were. There’s the hilt of a blade sticking out from between the collapsed man's shoulder blades. Too many people are around here and my mind can’t register any of their faces.

“Sakura.” A voice. A warm touch. An excited smile with lit up eyes. I look up to see Shisui supporting most of my weight and everything feels like it was crashing around me as I see his unique swirled ruby eyes. It’s hard to breathe with the crisp, cold air around me and my lungs are stinging. I bury my head in his chest, holding on for dear life as he cooperates with a hug of his own. For some reason the thing that stuck to me most about that man was the fact he had freckles.

Gin and Shisui take me home. No one says anything and if either are curious about who the other is they don't voice it outloud. Squirrel is curled up around the nape of my neck and I remember they were thrown off of me during the fall. The countless questions those faceless Shinoi had asked me ran through my head, resonating in my core and melding there.

‘ _Have you seen this man before?’_

_‘What did he tell you?’_

_‘Do you believe what he said?’_

_‘Do you feel bad he’s dead?’_

_‘You know he hurt you, right?’_

_‘It’s thought he was going to kill you. Did you feel like that was going to happen?’_

_‘It looked like it.’_

_‘Don’t feel guilty.’_

_‘Forget about this if you can.’_

It’s only a good bit of time later, after the _warm, sticky, now cold_ , _(it’s still there)_ blood is washed off and my clothes are changed. After my parents fretted around me as they saw what state I came in and Dad checked how hard I had hit my head against the _hard, harsh, still cold, freezing ice_ pavement and gave me the okay. After I let _thrown off, yanked away, nails digging in and squawking_ Squirrel in through the window. I remember I hadn’t done my homework.

“.....Oh for fuck’s sake.”

  
  


A week passes of school and talking and skirting around the subject of What The Fuck Happened. Rumors traveled, of course, some simple like I had run into a man and he was particularly angry all the way to I had been the one to kill the man. 

The first time someone walked up and asked if it was true Gin had landed herself in detention once she slammed the poor girl in the face with her fist. Of course Naruto heard of these rumors and acted in a manner I didn’t quite expect but I can’t say I’m too surprised.

“I heard that you got attacked by some guy!” Naruto's loud voice came before the start of class and I could already feel my stress levels rising. _Why is Gin not here yet-_

“Wha- yeah?”

“What the heck! I’m supposed to be the one to beat you!” He gaufs loudly and I blink slowly.

“....That’s what you’re worried about?”

“Well duh- Hey stop laughing! I’m serious here!”

A strange sort of life continued as always and I tried to ignore the extra amount of large black birds that hung around. Gin would continue to insist walking me home and I would continuously question why. Our class would continue developing faster than the others much to most of the children’s annoyance (Mine included). 

Slowly, the entire class was an outcast and you better pray you’re not immediately recognized as class D if you belonged to the class. The teachers were either oblivious to this behavior or turned a blind eye.

It was one chilly March morning that Azamuki-Sensei approached my desk. The class was thinned for now and I had arrived early for the sole purpose of sitting beside the window seat before Naruto, once again, took it from me. In her hands was the paper I recognize as the one I turned in for the second day at the academy-- The one about something that interested us. I braced myself for her critical thoughts, only able to believe that’s why she’d talk to me.

“Hey, Sakura- Chan,” Azamuki-Sensei pulled out the chair next to me and sat down, placing the paper on the desk in front of me. “I wanted to talk about your paper if that’s alright with you? The one about something that interests you?”

“O- oh?” I look up at her brown eyes. “Did I mess up?”

“No, quite the opposite, actually,” She smiles. “I was wondering if you had a particular interest in poisons for a reason and if you were interested in researching more.”

In a second all nervousness in my chest evaporates and is replaced by delight. “Really?” I light up. “Yes, of course I am!” 

“That’s great,” She leans back. “Meet me after class, alright?”

I nod as she stands, taking the paper with her. For the rest of class I’m filled with happiness that’s not even dampered down when Naruto tries to kick me out of my seat. After class, everyone but Gin and me file out, the one that’s not me looking curious.

“Hey, what’s the wait up Sakura?”

“Sakura is staying a bit after class for me,” Azamuki answers before I can, still cleaning up after class. “And it’s Wednesday, remember? You have detention.”

Gin, of course, goes to protest, but I pause her in the movement as I put my hand on her shoulder. “I’ll wait for you until you're done, okay? Here, you can take my bag so I don’t forget.” I offer my satchel and Gin recognizes the secret message for what it is. _‘Squirrel will keep you company and I’d never leave them.’_ With a great huff she grabs the satchel and stomps out.

Now just the two of us I expectantly turn to Azamuki- Sensei to see her wiping the last of today’s lesson off of the blackboard. Finally, the round faced woman turns to face me and smiles, beckoning me forward with a waving hand.

Thirty minutes later I leave the classroom, both my arms and head stuffed with information I had never thought about. The different toxins and venoms and their uses, what kind of forms they can take(liquid, gas, powder), and how to recognize which one was used. How some don’t even kill, only disoriate the victim or put them in a coma. I’d question whether or not it’s actually okay for me-- a child-- to have this information just handed to me but this is the Naruto universe where child soldiers are the next big thing.

Now outside in the cold, I lean against one of the courtyard trees and get comfortable reading a scroll. Azamuki- Sensei said I must absolutely go through this one first. Labeled with ‘Safety Precautions for a Beginner Poison User’ I already have a pretty good idea on what exactly this is about. Soon I’m immersed in the life of ink and poisons from the scroll, going through all of the necessary rules and cares I must take if I were to ever use a toxin. The danger of making my own and how cautiously I should pack my bag and rations when considering what else is in there.

The chill in the air increases and a shiver up my spine releases me from the spell that simple scroll had on me. Frowning, I stand and look around to see no one…. Detention should have been over by now judging from the pink turning sky. Biting my tongue, I collect my things and make my way back into the academy. Voices reach my ears and my steps on wood increases, growing louder and faster until I’m running down the hallway

“Let me go!” I hear Gin’s voice and bust in the classroom just in time to catch sight of the scene. Gin, held down on a chair as a group of children ranging from age surround her. One is holding a pair of scissors and grinning widely. No teacher is to be seen.

I pause for just a second before I move to kick the one with the scissors. It seems no one had seen or heard me over the commotion judging by the look of surprise on everyone else’ face, Gin included.

“Get away from her!” I yell, moving to kick the person again. I’m stopped as my world tilts sideways and I’m thrown to the floor. My body hits the wood harshly and is kept there as something connects with my gut hard and any hope of breathing is crashed out of the door. The pair of their hands roughly grab my arms, the iron grip refusing to let up as I’m held face to face with the one who I had previously kicked. The ringleader…. I hear in my head through the panic and pain.

“Oh? We have a hero here, do we?” The boy chuckles, head turning to look at the rest of the small crowd as if to ask ‘Can you believe this?’

“An ugly one, too, with that bacon face!” He laughs and his gaze once again goes around to the other children as they laugh with him. His smile, however, is wiped off his face as my spit lands on his cheek.

Slowly, the spittle is swiped off by his hand, the crowd silent for once. He looks from me to his hand as if in shock before a new kind of pain blooms across my cheek, delivered in the form of knuckles. The sound of the room returns in cheering and I hear Gin screaming in the background but it’s hard to keep up over the pain of repeatedly being hit in the head, arms, chest, and stomach. I’m dropped brutally on the ground, iron shackles of hands finally letting up and giving me nothing to support myself with. The merciless barrage of the beating continues, turning into kicks and all I can do is curl into myself and take it, hoping my head doesn't get hit too hard.

Finally, it stops and even though there’s more noise around me I can’t seem to register what it is over the ringing of my ears. There’s a commotion going on and I can understand that much but I can’t find myself realizing why over the horrible feeling that resonates throughout my body. A horrible pain I’m unused to as I daze off, the things around me slowing to a halt. Nothing can breach the inners of my mind where I put myself and I don’t want to leave.

_Tick-_

_Tock_

I’m shocked out of it all over again as I gasp in pain and open my eyes. The classroom is empty except for us two. Me, bruised and bloody on the floor and Gin, teary with her once beautiful, long hair unevenly cut short. What once met the middle of her back is now to her skull, hardly any pieces going to her ears, the chocolate painted hair now ruined.

“....Your hair,” I mumble.

“Why are you worrying about my hair?!” She demands through the onslaught of choking tears. “What about you?! I thought you were dead, Sakura!”

I flinch at the loud noise as I remain on the ground, green eyes squinting to try and see past the black spots dancing across my vision. “I’m fine…” I slur, wincing as I try and lift my head but stop as a headache knocks loudly on my door.

“....Squirrel is asleep in the satchel” Gin quiets down at my attempts but as my vision clears I can finally make out the hateful expression on her face even as she delivers this new information.

_‘Welcome to the club….’_

“I’ll kill them,” She promises, helping me sit up as I request.

“I- ah-” I gasp in pain and pause, Gin waiting patiently. “....I don’t doubt you but, ow, but maybe you should…. Should think about it.”

Gin huffs as she supports my weight, bringing me to one of the chairs so she can collect our things. “I have thought about it and I want revenge.”

The entire chair supports my weight and even then it feels like I’m using too much of my body as my own weight bears against the chair and consequently my bruises. “You can get revenge by…. Not killing.” I say, still not quite focussed eyes staring at the ceiling.

“.....How?” She asks suspiciously.

“We need to find Naruto.” I try to smile but that stretches the forming bruise on my cheek from the first blow.

“Ow….”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Summary: Sakura meets teacher and then boom walking home with Gin cause they have an assignment but not before they find out their class will be learning a lot faster than the others(which the other classes don’t like!) But wowza! Some man runs into Sakura and starts yelling some ~crazy~ things which pretty scary to a seven year old girl but not as much as watching said man die on top of you! Shisui is there and everything is just a liiiittle blurred but that’s only cause of the shock and those are some weird questions Mr. Ninja Man what do you mean I should forget about it? Anywhoo Gin and Shisui bring Sakura home who happens to be covered in blood but that’s what happens when a man dies on you. Anyways Sakura almost forgets to do her homework but don’t worry she gets it done. Later at school her teach sets her up with some good ol’ poison scrolls cause that’s what her paper was about! Cause Gin has detention for beating someone up she had to stay behind and Sakura waited but that went on for too long and Sakura went back to see Gin in a chair and bullying and bla bla bla Sakura tried bla bla bla she gotta beat up bla bla bla they cut Gin’s hair real short and yeah bitch is angry the end 
> 
> Also in case it wasn’t obvious: Shisui was the one who killed them man. Because to him it looked like a grown ass man pinning down a seven year old he happened to be pretty fond of and we all know how that Uchiha anger goes. I guess it was lucky he was in the area? As for those faceless ninja.... well.... who knows. Also bullying children are mean and obviously they’re a bunch of hooligans going to detention the first weeks of school(looking at you Gin) 
> 
> And we have a winner! Lucky number eight is what will direct how we’ll be doing this! Yay..... 
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	8. A Plucked Seed from the Roots

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gin, Sakura, and Naruto plot revenge which opens up a plethora of reactions when executed. 
> 
> Shisui is worried. 
> 
> Squirrel is napping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m one day late but I promise I have a good reason! The reason is writers block have a good day!

“Ya know….” Gin drawls from beside me as she supports all of my weight, crows cawing in a distance. “From the way you said it I figured we would’ve searched for Naruto right away.” As she speaks my side jostled painfully and I wince, a flash of white spiking over my eyelids as they flinch closed. Squirrel chitters from on top of Gin’s head as if in agreement, the traitor.

“Well,” I grunt as we pass the academy gate entrance, the sky becoming darker by the second, “If you know where he is… I’d love to hear it.” My speech feels slurred and slow, heavy on my tongue and like cotton in my mouth. 

Even in my past life I’ve never gone through anything like that-- The worst thing being when I was shot in the chest twice. Yeah that had hurt like a bitch and later being burned to the point I feel as if I’d die a second time didn't help. But the shock had kept me from complaining about it too much (That and the blood in my lungs and inability to speak respectively). I’m no stranger to bruises and scraped knees, yet never had it been to this amount, ranging from my shins to my back and, quite unfortunately, centering around my stomach. Now that I’m thinking about it Gin’s idea for murder does sound more appealing….

“Even so,” Gin snaps me back to reality and away from spilling blood, “You were very dramatic about it.”

“And you wanting to, ow, murder them…. Isn’t?” I tease with a cynical smile, the pain also giving me a much looser tongue. 

Gin rolls her eyes, most definitely not accidentally shoving my side as I lean on her. “I’d like a fast and permanent solution, thank you.” She speaks calmly as I wheeze in discomfort, my side throbbing.

“You fucker…. Murder isn’t as fast as you think.” I glare in annoyance, expression probably more out of it than I’d like. 

“It’s permanent.” She insists, helping me back into a comfortable position as I lean on her. 

“And illegal- holy shit!” I spin around in surprise as a new presence appears out of nowhere, heart racing. Shisui stares at me seriously from where he stood. 

“Ow, ow, fuck, shit, ow. That hurt.” I complain as Gin holds me up from completely flopping on the ground. 

“How did you even know he was there-” 

“What happened.” Shisui’s voice cut through my next response as Gin and I blink up at him. 

“....We got in trouble with some other kids,” Gin answered defensively, Squirrel chittering uncomfortably as they pace the ground in front of us, having jumped from Gin’s head when I turned around. 

“What kind of trouble.” He had a tone I’ve never heard from him. It chilled me to the spot, taking hold of my veins and freezing the lifeblood pumping inside of them. I didn’t like it. 

“We’re fine,” I insist, finally able to stand up all the way again, still unfortunately leaning on Gin. “Nothing,” I wince, “you need to worry about.” 

Shisui hesitates, the entire string of thought and body seemingly paused. Whatever was in his dark (but not empty) eyes is now gone and the next time he speaks the ice wrapping around my skin thaws. “It’s getting dark so I’ll take you two home but you better tell me what happened the next time I see you.” He said sternly. 

He was right about the getting dark thing at least. When I had earlier gone back to the academy the sun was just starting to set but by now the sky is void of pink but not yet completely dark. Now, I wouldn’t be one to call walking in that safe, but confident child brain says that I’ll be fine and it does make a pretty good argument. Unfortunately, before I could decline his offer, Gin swooped in and decided to be the responsible one. 

“Thanks,” It appears she’s still angry. I could relate if I wasn’t so busy being numb and just a little out of it. 

I expected after that for Shisui to just simply walk us both home and then be on his way. Not pick us up(Much to my developing bruises protests) and then bring us home in what felt like the blink of an eye(It was probably just a few seconds but I’m just a tad too disoriented to realize that). In short, I’m trying to get air back into my lungs which felt bruised. Can lungs be bruised? I need to ask a book about that. Oh wait, Shisui is talking. Fuck.

“-So I’ll see you again in three weeks, alright?” Before leaving. I blink, still confused and trying to catch up with what he said. 

“Wha…?” I blink slowly as Gin tries to escort me into the house. She huffs and pulls my arm, guiding me past the threshold and letting herself in. I only realize in the back of my head that this is the first time the other had been in my home. 

“Come on, let’s get you some ice,” Gin sighed and after some kind of complicated maneuvering with the hallways and the way our house is set up, she found the itchen and brought me on, sitting me on a chair. The table in front of me held a small note and with bleary eyes. 

‘Date night tonight!!!! Be back late!!!!!! Love youuuuuuu!!!!!! -Dad ♡♡♡’

I breathlessly laugh, eyes drooping close as an almost serene silence follows. Squirrel snuggled and draped themself over the nape of my neck, which now appears to be their favorite spot. I’m shocked out of it as my skin practically freezes on the spot, the sudden temperature change stilling me in surprise. I flinch back and turn to see a snickering Gin, holding a prepared ice pack in her hands. 

“Not funny,” I grumble, snatching the ice pack from her hands with a glare and putting it on the part that hurts the most(My stomach). 

Gin is still smirking as she shakes her head and turns around. “I’ll see you at school so by then you better have an explanation for your-” She pauses, blinking down at her wrist. 

“Ah…” I hesitate. Before I could think, my hand had reached out and grabbed her before she could leave. “Stay for the night? For like… a sleepover?”

“Oh.” Gin’s features soften as she smiles brightly, wrist slipping from my grasp. “Sure! That way you can just inform me right away?”

“....Yeah,” I smile back, though something in me knows that isn’t the correct answer. “Let’s get some dinner then, yeah?” 

A simple nod is what returns my suggestion. 

  
  


The next day we got up super early at my request to sneak downstairs and leave without my parent’s detection. When asked why I cited that it’s better civilians are kept out of Shinobi life and Gin accepted it like that. Our escape was quick and precise, the only aftereffect being we arrived at the Academy early enough that hardly anyone was around. Luckily, after waiting in the crisp winter air for a few minutes, someone opened the door for us and we were able to make it in safely. 

Earlier I had my scarf to hide most of my face when the person let us in. But now, with a bright light over us in this warm classroom, I had no excuse. And just like that I feel trapped. Vulnerable, as if I’d be cast away for showing the physical side of my weakness. I wish I could be like Gin, who took off the winter hat I lent her right away and walked as if nothing could take her down. 

As if running down a dark path that gets slimmer and slimmer until I fall down, down, down, air whistling in my ears and darkness surrounding me. I blink and I’m back in the same warm, bright classroom, only Gin and me the occupants in the room. Slowly, my hand reaches and undoes the scarf, skin feeling prickly under all that heat. Gin seems quieter than usual, dark eyes trained on the scarf in my hand. 

“You…. alright?” I ask, voice strikingly loud in such a quiet and empty room.

Gin’s eyes snap to mind, looking as if she’s surprised. “Oh…. ah, yeah. All fine here.” Tearing her gaze away, she sits, eye trained on the wall in front of her. For the first time ever it appears Gin got the window seat and she’s not even using it. Silently, I take my own seat and rest my head, face hidden. A quick glance has my unhidden eyes catching onto Gin’s still short and choppy hair. We should fix it sometime.

More kids file in, their footsteps and quiet murmuring of conversation fill the once quiet room. An almost serene atmosphere filled the previously stilled room. As more children came in, I found myself comparing the class to my first second grade class in my original life. The class I’m used to is more rambunctious, with yelling children, eager for their next craft. This set of group, however, is quieter, meeker…. Afraid, I’d even say. 

“WHAT!” The deafening voice of Naruto echoed in the classroom, shattering my original perception. “Gin got the window seat today?!” I wince and lift my head, tiredly glaring with drooping eyes.

“Why are you so lou-”

“What happened to your face?!” Said face burns brightly as Naruto cuts me off and brings the rest of the class’s attention to the brown and blue blemish on my cheek.Grumbling angrily, I pull him down to the last seat, glaring at any extra peering eyes to flinch away. 

“But seriously! And Gin’s hair!” 

“Shut up,” I hiss, eye twitching in annoyance. “I’ll explain it after school but stop mentioning it.” Fed up, I turn in my seat and take out the previously put away scarf, Squirrel chittering quietly in annoyance as I take away their soft spot. Not caring, I wrap the article of clothing around my neck and loosen it so it covers my cheek. Unfortunately, this leaves me with a difficulty to breathe but it’s ignored as Azamuki- Sensei walks in and class finally begins. She kept eyeing my scarf and Gin’s hair, of course, but said nothing about it and never approached us. 

At lunch I stubbornly remain in my seat, refusing to go outside in the cold to join the other students. Gin stayed with me for a bit, but later left for the bathroom and didn’t come back. I didn’t blame her for wanting to be away but something nagged at me to make sure she was okay. Still, I remained in my seat, feeding bits of my food to Squirrel, until everyone filed back in. Gin included, who cited she was held back by Naruto for some game. 

Finally, class ended and Naruto, Gin, and I stayed in the same seat until the rest of the kids left. Azamuki- Sensei continued to send us questioning looks but by then we were already ready to leave, knowing most of the school will be devoid of children. 

“You gonna tell me what’s goin’ on now?” Naruto huffed, looking between Gin and me after we had dragged him to one of the more secluded parts of the Academy courtyard. 

“We were attacked.” Gin decided to start us off and I really wish it wasn’t so bluntly. 

“WHA-!”

“Shh!” I shush aggravatedly as Gin managed to shut him up instantly, her hand over his mouth. 

“Whammmeam!” Naruto’s words were muffled with Gin’s hand and only then did she let go. “What do you mean attacked?” He asked after being freed. 

“Bullies.” I cut in before Gin said anything else that would make him react louder. “Gin wanted to kill them but I figured you’d have a better way for revenge.”

It seemed I was correct with the way Naruto’s face twisted into a smile that meant nothing but mischief and chaos. “Oh, I have just the thing,” He cackles. 

  
  


I was lucky enough my parents didn’t start questioning my new attire. The scarf became a frequent accessory of mine, paired with long sleeves and sometimes gloves just to be safe. They were seemingly expecting there to be a time where I only wanted to eat in my room, too, so I just have to be thankful that they weren’t meddling. If they had, our plan might not have gone as well as it did. 

For a week we waited, stalking our prey. Gin was able to perfectly point out the ones that had attacked her and then later me with surprising accuracy for a seven year old. Some of the people I didn’t even remember seeing(To be fair all I really did see was a fist and a foot but still). 

Naruto told us to keep track of each name and their schedule, the places they frequent, and the most common hang out spot in the academy. All of this information was compiled by Gin, which I later sorted so that it made sense and was easy to navigate. I’m still stuck trying to figure out how the hell a bunch of children managed to gather this much information but whatever. It’s whatever. Weird and questionable, but I refuse to do the questioning. 

“‘M not very good at reading,” Naruto grumbles one early, Friday morning as he flips through the information we had gathered in the empty classroom. Gin mutters something about wanting an excuse to back out but I elbow her in the side to shut her up. 

“I’ll explain anything that’s confusing,” I reassure, dodging to the side to avoid Gin’s swipe at my head. I’m still bruised to hell and back, I don’t need a sore head. 

“Yeah, yeah, I got it,” Naruto muttered, hand waving as he pours over the given information. 

“So you gonna tell us what this is for?” Gin interrupted, crossing her arms. 

“In a bit,” Naruto stressed, tone annoyed. 

“Why can’t-“ The rest of Gin’s words are muffled. 

“If you want me to help you gotta let me scheme,” Naruto huffed, taking his hand away from Gin’s face. 

Gin grumbles more but remains quiet, instead crossing her arms and looking off to the side. I remain passive, head laid on the desk in light of my new exhaustion. Turns out organizing a bunch of information on a large group of people I hardly know is tiring. Crazy, right? It’s only when I’m about to fall asleep, warm in my scarf with a not yet hidden away Squirrel sleeping on the nape of my neck, that Naruto decides to ruin that. 

“I’ve got it!” I jolt awake, dry eyes blinking blearily as Squirrel chitters angrily, getting tangled in my scarf.

“Wha di’ ya,” I mumble, rubbing my eyes as Naruto shows off a…. Drawing? Stick figure people along with what looks like weird clumps of things and grass(?) Is that grass?

“What is it?” Gin raised an eyebrow, gaze trained on the picture as she plucks a struggling Squirrel to freedom. 

“Wha-” Naruto squawks, mouth agape, “It’s my plan! The best plan you’ve ever seen, in fact!” 

“Are those brains?” I squint, pointing at what looks like poorly drawn clouds on some of the stick figures’ heads. 

“It’s gum!” He huffs. 

“Those look like cookies,” Gin joins in, voice bland as she points to different circles on people's heads. 

“They’re targets!” Naruto takes the paper away, rolling it up and stuffing it under his seat. “I’ll explain it to ya guys but not if you’re gonna be that judgemental!” He scolds, waving his arms around with a glare. 

“Don’t be that bad at drawing, then,” Gin rolls her eyes, cheek leaning into her hand, supported on her side of the desk. “Better yet, tell us what you plan instead of giving us a crude drawing.”

“Alright, alright, fine!” Naruto mimics Gin, also rolling his eyes. “But because of that I’m making you wait ‘till after school!” 

Three days later, on one chilled February Monday morning, we set our trap and waited. According to Naruto this will be his greatest prank yet and we should be honored to be a part of it. His proclamation was met with scepticism, of course, but I already promised a nice dinner as thanks to both of them so it’s not like he’ll suddenly take back his plans because of our attitude. Two hours and fifty seven seconds later, when the Academy is full with children, our trap was sprung. 

Twelve students, two girls and ten boys, were met with gum in their hair, sticky clothes, and itching powder at three separate locations in the Academy hallways for all to see. I’ll tell you how it happened: In the early mornings of this morning the three of us had set up traps designed to catch those twelve students and only them.

The two girls--twins-- along with one of the boys--the leader-- were the oldest and I was assigned to their hall. The twins happen to go everywhere together, and their schedule lines up with the leader’s because they share the same homeroom. After a week of observation done by Gin we discovered that all always wait together in the morning in one secluded corner. That is where we set up the trap. And me, hiding in the crowd of milling students, pulled the rope when the clock hit seven o'clock just as planned. 

Similarly, we had set up the same contraption for the second oldest group that was assigned to Naruto. There were six of them this time and, much to our headache’s strife, two of the six separate from the group and stand by themself. This, however, was easily remedied when Naruto made it look as if their usual spots are closed off and with some quick whispering in the crowd of rumors that involved a group of six for a project, they were easily herded to the correct place. At seven o’clock, Naruto pulled his rope and down came the humiliation. 

Gin arguably had it the easiest. All she had to do was wait outside our classroom with kids the same age as us until the three boys began to walk through their classroom door. Because she didn’t have to time her attack and only had to wait until they came through to pull her rope, it was kinda easy, especially because she didn’t have to hide from being younger. So at six forty-six, Gin pulled her rope and our revenge was delivered. 

That doesn’t mean we went through with it without risk, of course. At the beginning of all of this, Gin had stressed the absolute importance that we are not caught, much to Naruto’s dismay. To him, a prank at this scale should be celebrated and bragged about. To her, however, a prank at this scale from such a loser class would make them an even larger target and if anyone thought it to be us we might face even more backlash and not to mention the punishments that the teachers would give out. When asked for my opinion, I agreed with Gin but brought up the fact they wouldn’t know it was revenge and wouldn’t know to not mess with us anymore. 

The solution worked well for us. A simple symbol that to anyone else would look like a common household object was planted at each scene. These twelve students would see it, however, and get the message. If they attempted to out us, though, they’d be forced to explain why they know what that means and get into even more trouble than we would. If they’re smart then they wouldn’t approach us again unless they want another prank to plague their morning. Laying innocently at each area, is a pair of scissors, one of the handles gone. 

The offenders received the message perfectly judging by the glares we’re given in the hallways and muttering throughout the school. Rumors popped up of this group in the “Cheater Class” that had pranked a large group of students, one of them unfortunately being aclan kid. In our defence how were we supposed to tell that leader dude was a Yamanaka? Naruto has blond hair too! Along with the rumors came…. More problems. 

It seems that our little escapade had put a larger target on our classes' backs, and while we were never touched directly, more kids came in with bruises. We watched, early in the morning, as some venture to tell Azamuki-Sensei, who only turned them away with a scolding of starting rumors, ignoring the shining bruises on their arms and betrayal in their eyes. The three of us shared a look and it only took some silent leading on my part and Naruto’s actual verbal pleading for Gin to cave. 

“Fine, fine, we’ll fix this, just stop looking like that!” 

It took more planning, of course, just not to the scale of the first one. Apparently, I’m the one that the students open up to the most. As a result, I record everything that’s done to them and take a description of the perpetrator(Perpetrators if there’s more than one). There was one time a student, the smallest in the class, came in covered in bruises. We didn’t have to plan a revenge for that one. Gin got a description right away from the poor girl and next thing we heard there was a boy that had to go to the hospital. He refused to give a description of his attacker, claiming he never saw his face. 

I’ve always been a little afraid of Gin after that. 

  
  


A week later, as promised, Shisui returned and demanded answers. By then the bullying problem from the class had toned down significantly. Only a few kids would come up from time to time, whispering of stolen homework which we would swiftly deal with. The bruise on my face is now only a discolored spot, my stomach only a light shade of brown and blue(Which no one ever saw). The face I explained away with running into a door. My parents believed me after Gin vouched as well, citing how funny it was. In short, we have it handled and don't need the older people meddling. 

“No, I think I still need to go down there and have a talk,” Shisui shook his head after I had finished explaining everything that happened in the past weeks. 

“Some kids already tried to talk to Azamuki- Sensei about it,” I shook my head. “One got punished for trying to spread nasty rumors. It’s better if we handle this by ourselves.”

Shisui stills. “Your teacher…. Didn’t believe you?” 

“Not me specifically,” I shake my head, not quite registering that new tone in Shisui’s voice. “I didn’t tell her anything but few kids tried after they got attacked,” 

“Then we need to report the teacher. Obviously this “Azamuki” is unfit to teach if she’ll just let that slide. 

“Ah…” I trail off, “There have been rumors that one kid hd tried to and…. Wll, he’s still on suspension.” 

“What the hell happened to the Academy!”

“Language.”

“That’s not the subject we’re on!”

I hesitate, “You…. know some things aren’t right.” Shisui stills as I speak. “And that sometimes there’s not much you can do about the little glares in the hallway but try and change it little by little.” 

“.....” He remained silent, the seconds stretching on between us. I can’t see the emotion on his face, too blinded by anxiety to register it clearly. After three more agonizing seconds, he sighs, rubbing his head and just like that the once tense thread between us is laxened. “Sometimes I think there’s actually an adult in you with how smart you are, Racoon-Chan.” He chuckles and ruffles my hair.

_ ‘Try seventeen instead,’ _

  
  


It’s about one month after joining the academy, on a March afternoon, that it feels like the sky collapses onto me, leaving me without a plane to swim to in the expanse of fluffy, suffocating cloud. That day, at the ending of class, a student(Kōri, my mind supplied) asked an innocent question. 

“Sensei?” She raised her hand, childish voice curious. “When is Kotoba-Kun coming back?” Normally so quiet and she asks about the boy that had been suspended for reporting a teacher. 

Azamuki’s expression remained the same, though I can clearly see the way her brown eyes soured, stinking up the room. A collective shiver ran up the class's spin and I scooted closer to Gin and Naruto when she smiled. 

“Kotoba has been transferred to a different class as many of you will also do. This class is nicknamed the Transfer Class by some of the faculty, afterall.” 

We never saw Kotoba in the halls and we never will see any student ‘transferred’ out of the class again. The year of fear starts and it is a battle to keep your head over the wisps of cloud and shards of sky.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh no! What happened to Kotoba? The world may never know~ 
> 
> Tell me what you guys think please! Your comments give me life!

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr for this story: writing-with-Nobuko
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
